Loving Doubts
by Opague
Summary: Sequel to Decade! Bella and Edward are getting married but Bella can't seem to let go of the past. Can she walk down the aisle and be his wife after ten years of separation or is it truly just too little too late?
1. The Perfect Dress

Author's Note: After trying my new idea out for a couple of days, I realized I was going nowhere so now I have decided to continue this story. After this story is complete I will either write a sequel or continue NEW LIFE also. This happens on December 1st, the month of the wedding and the play.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

The Perfect Dress

"Bella, are you ready?" Alice said knocking on the door.

"Yeah, one second." I replied grabbing my jacket and slipping it on. I opened the door and followed her downstairs.

"Finally. Let's go I really can't wait!" Rosalie said when she saw me and raced to the door. Alice pulled me after her and into the car. Rosalie started the engine to her car and stepped on the gas pedal.

"How did you get the guys to leave?" I asked curiously.

"We threatened them. We told them that if they didn't leave us alone for a day that they wouldn't be able to touch us for two weeks," Rosalie answered amused while Alice laughed. I did too. We drove to Port Angeles listening to the radio and humming along to some of the songs we liked. Rosalie parked the car in front of a bridal shop and jumped out excitedly. Alice pushed the door open and stepped out first keeping it open for me. As soon as I was on my feet, Rosalie grabbed my arm and pulled me into the store.

"May I help you find something?" the sales lady asked politely but her eyes were staring at us with disbelief.

"No thanks, we can help ourselves," Alice said making her way to the dresses. We separated and began looking through the giant collection of dresses. I looked and looked but nothing called out to me, I was about to give up but then I caught sight of one at the end of the next rack. I moved over and picked it up. It was elegant, simple, and beautiful. It was a satin strapless white dress with three scarlet bands at the waist. I turned it slightly and saw red lining the ends of the fabric lining the train flowing down to the floor. The red lined the bottom of the dress all the way around leaving an a short oval train in the back.

"It's perfect!" Alice said coming over and looking at the dress too. Rosalie nodded in approval with a smile. "Can you get this one for us in a 4?" she asked the lady in the corner. She nodded and went to the back room. She returned momentarily with the dress and handed it to me. "Go on, go try it on for us," Alice pushed me in the direction of the dressing room. I took a deep breath and went inside. I got out of my clothes and slipped on the dress. It fit perfectly and complimented my narrow waist and even bringing out my chest a little. "Bella, we want to see too," Alice rushed. I opened the door and walked out slowly. I turned around so she could zip me up before taking a look. She slid it up quickly and pushed my waist slightly telling me to turn. She and Rosalie gasped dramatically as I gave them several turns.

"It's lovely, Edward will love it!" Rosalie complimented.

"Hey, that's my line!" Alice joked.

"We'll take it," I told the woman who was standing by the dressing room gawking at me with eyes as big as quarters. "I'll go change while you look for your dresses," I said walking back into the dressing room. I took one last glance at myself before taking the dress off and putting my clothes back on. Next time, I wear it will be my wedding day. The thought of it made my non-functioning heart flutter. I gathered the dress in my arms and placed it on the counter before coming over to Alice and Rosalie. They each held a simple strapless red satin dress that matched with the mine.

"What do you think?" Rosalie asked eagerly.

"Perfect." They giggled and shuffled into the dressing room to try it on. They came out at the same time looking absolutely perfect and radiant.

"We'll take them!" We said together. The salesperson rang them up and it totalled $649.50, I reached into my pocket for my credit card but Alice was much quicker.

"Bella, we're not letting you pay for this." Rosalie said stopping my arm. I opened my mouth to protest but she interrupted me. "Edward said whatever it is we're getting for your wedding will be paid for by him. If you want to complain, do it to him." I closed my mouth and Rosalie turned to Alice satisfied. When Alice was done with the payment procedure, we each grabbed a dress and headed to the car. Rosalie popped the trunk and placed her dress in, me and Alice followed. When everything was placed comfortably in, I closed the trunk and joined the others in the car.

"We have to get this in the house and into Rosalie's closet before the guys get back," Alice said. "So step on it." Rosalie did exactly that, she sped up to 150 mph as soon as we were on the highway. When we pulled into the driveway Rosalie popped the trunk and Alice jumped out grabbing the dresses and ran into the house.

"Come on Bella, we don't have much time," Rosalie said running after Alice pulling me with her. Alice was standing by the doorway of Rosalie's giant mall sized closet. Rosalie went in and cleared a spaced in the back hidden in her many many clothes. "Here, put them in here," she said pointing at the spot. Alice glided over and hung the stuff up adjusting it a bit so that it was fully hidden. We got out and closed the door to the closet just in time to hear the door open downstairs.

"Bella!" Edward yelled. I could hear his quiet footsteps coming up the stairs and walked out to meet him.

"Don't tell him a thing," Alice hissed.

Author's Note: The dress pics will be posted in my profile because I do a horrible job describing them. Type the URL if you must.


	2. Airport

**Author's Note: My summary isn't there to scare you, it is there to remind me what is the point of this story. Rest assured though, I love happy endings so no matter how sad I make things there is a very good chance it will end happily.**

**Disclaimer: I am no where near good enough to be the writer of Twilight.**

**Airport**

**"Don't tell me what?" Edward said staring at Alice, no doubt trying to read her mind.**

**"Stay out of my head Edward. You're not getting nothing from me." He growled turning to me.**

**"No Edward. I can't tell you either, you'll just have to wait and see." I responded shaking my head. He stuck out his bottom lip for a moment before lifting me over his shoulder and carrying me to our room. "Ahh! Put me down! Edward, not now, I still have things to do." He ignored me dropping me onto our new bed.**

**"What could possibly be more important than this?" He asked skeptically. He placed himself on top of me wrapping his arms around my waist firmly.**

**"I'm not done planning for the wedding." I complained. "Can't we do this later?" He seemed to consider it for a moment.**

**"No. There's still 12 days left until the wedding, you have plenty of time. I haven't seen you all day so this can't wait." He explained. He leaned down and began kissing me on the neck tenderly. I was about to give up but then my cell phone started to vibrate furiously in my pocket. **

**"Edward, get off me. My cell phone is ringing." He didn't stop though.**

**"You can call them back later." He said between kisses.**

**"No I can't." I muttered using my leg as a lever to push him off. He rolled off me and layed beside me with a disappointed look. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the phone. I slid it open and placed it to my ear already knowing who was calling. "Hello?" I answered.**

**_"Bella? Me and Elizabeth just arrived at the airport. Can you come pick us up?" _Henry asked excitedly. **

**"Of course I can, give me 20 minutes." I replied jumping off the bed.**

_**"Alright, see you soon. Elizabeth can't wait to meet you."**_

**"I can't wait to meet her too." I slid the phone shut, grabbed my keys, and ran downstairs.**

**"Bella, I'm coming with you." Edward said running after me. He beat me to the front door and held it open for me closing it after us. I climbed into the driver's seat and started the car as Edward got in himself. I pulled away from the house going at 120 mph towards the airport. While I was driving my head popped an idea. I needed someone to give me away at my wedding and since I didn't really have a father I kept in contact with, why not ask Henry? He had been there for me like a big brother for the past eight years, and in that time, was the only family I had.**

**"Edward?" I called.**

**"Yes dear." He answered looking intently at me.**

**"Would you mind if I asked Henry to give me away at our wedding?" I questioned hesitantly. I saw a smile grow on his lips slowly and it calmed me. **

**"Of course not. I think that's a very good idea. In fact, why don't you ask Elizabeth to be another one of your bridesmaid?" He offered. I laughed happily taking my eyes off the road for a moment to kiss him slightly on the cheek.**

**"I think I will. Thank you Edward."**

**"Anything for you, my love." He whispered in my ear. "And remember, you promised me later." I giggled and nodded. I pulled into the parking lot of the airport and found a parking space without the slightest problem. I practically jumped out of the car but Edward was there holding me back. "Sweetheart, slow down or you'll attract unecessary attention to yourself." I sighed and straightened myself and nodded at him. He led me into the airport at human pace holding my hand so I don't rush ahead. He searched the TV's for Henry's gate number with me almost jumping up and down at the holdup. After he found the information we needed, he pulled me to the right stopping at gate 5. The passengers were already let out and some were greeted by family members, others were still waiting for their family to arrive. I turned a full circle looking for Henry's familiar face but failed.**

**"Bella!" I turned in the direction of the voice and saw his unmistakable blond hair and blue eyes. I ran to him carefully at human speed with Edward trailing behind. He let go of his luggage and held out his arms to receive my hug. If he hadn't braced for impact, it would've knocked him to the ground. He swung me around and we laughed shortly before I was let back on my feet. Edward reached us and cleared his throat. Henry straightened and held out his hand which Edward took and shook it firmly. "How has he been treating you, Bella?" Henry asked sarcastically. I laughed at his comment.**

**"Great. I'll tell you when he doesn't." I replied wrapping my arm around Edward's shoulders. **

**"Who is that?" Edward asked. I turned in the direction he was looking at and my mouth dropped open in shock.**

**"Oh, let me introduce you to Elizabeth Johnson." Henry informed taking the baggage from her and kissing her on the cheek.**

**Author's Note: Review! **


	3. Coincidences

**Author's Note: Sorry about the cliffhanger, but you know how it's an author's favorite trick.**

**Disclaimer: I am not Ms. Meyer so I do not own Twilight.**

_**Coincidences**_

**I couldn't believe my own eyes so I blinked several times to see if I was hallucinating. Every time I opened my eyes she was still there so she couldn't be a hallucination right? She was staring at me with absolute utter shock too. **

**"Edward, you're seeing what I'm seeing too right?" I asked. He nodded slightly but kept his eyes on her probably trying to convince himself he wasn't seeing things too. I have been staring at her for at least five minutes now and the only difference between us would be our eye color. Mine was gold like Edward's due to our hunting choices but here's were green. **

**"Um, Bella you don't have a lost twin we don't know about, do you?" Edward asked suspiciously. I glared at him.**

**"Don't you think I would've mentioned it if I did?" I shot back.**

**"Um, maybe I should explain," Henry cut in. I looked around and realized some people were starting to stare longer than they should. I shook my head at him.**

**"Let's get to the car, we can talk there," I suggested nudging Edward at his side. He stepped forward and took Elizabeth's bags from her and I led the way out of the airport. We walked out to the car and I popped the trunk with the controller so Edward and Henry could haul the bags into it. I had a lot of questions to ask so I threw the keys to Edward watching him catch it happily and jump into the car. I got in the passenger seat and Elizabeth and Henry slipped into the back.**

**"Bella, how old are you?" Elizabeth asked from the back seat. I was about to ask the same question but she got to it first.**

**"I'm 28," I replied. Her voice was the same as mine too, so much for everyone is different. **

**"Well then, we're not lost twins. I was born 100 years before you were," she declared.**

**"When is your birthday Elizabeth?" The question just popped into my head. I wanted to see how many coincidences me and her had together.**

**"September 13th." Edward stiffened at the wheel and I did in my seat.**

**"Me too," I managed to let out. **

**"I guess that it's time for my explanation?" Henry added softly. We all nodded in agreement. "We met on the pier that I was inspecting. She thought I was her boyfriend because of my blond hair and figure so she kicked me into the water through a fit of rage." He chuckled quietly grabbing her hand and placing it on his lap. "That's what I meant when I said she knocked me off my feet." She giggled at his words. "At first I thought she was you too and couldn't shake the feeling that you were playing a prank on me, but Elizabeth proved to be nothing like you in personality. Instead of apologizing to me, she yelled at me for standing in the way of her foot!" He laughed and she elbowed him in the ribs. "After a while of arguing, she caught sight of her cheating boyfriend and I helped her catch him. We became friends and after a while, much more." His story made me feel warm all over and I smiled at the feeling. Edward took one of his hands off the wheel and took mine telling me he felt the same way too. **

**"So, you don't know how they could look like exact replicas of each other?" Edward asked curiously.**

**"No. In fact, I just told Elizabeth about that on the plane but she wouldn't believe me so I let her see for herself." Henry answered.**

**"I wouldn't have either. What are the odds?" I added. We stayed silent for a moment before I realized that I had forgotten to ask Henry something. "Henry?" He took his eyes off Elizabeth and placed it on me.**

**"Yeah?" **

**"Would you like to give me away at my wedding?" I said quickly getting it over with. He smiled his giant puppy dog smile easing my worries.**

**"Of course. Anything for my sister." He answered teasing. I turned to Elizabeth next.**

**"Elizabeth, will you be one of my bridesmaids?" She nodded slowly locking her eyes with mine.**

**"Are you sure? We just met and I don't want to intrude." **

**"Don't be silly, you will be family soon." I winked at her and her face lit up. "I will make sure of that, isn't that right Henry?" He raised his eyebrow at me but nodded. "We'll go get your dress tomorrow okay?" She nodded.**

**"We're here," Edward announced stopping the car and opening his door. "The family is going to flip when they see you two!" He said amused like this was a movie he wanted to see. He went over and opened the door for me taking my hand in his and leading me out of the car. Apparently, my movements at vampire speed still wasn't fast enough because he lifted me onto his shoulders and ran to the door.**

**"I have legs you know," I protested. He placed me on the ground and bent over to rub his nose against mine.**

**"I know but you are so precious I don't want you to ever touch the ground," he whispered. My mind started to cloud over but I pulled back knowing we have guests. I turned the doorknob and was met by Alice's arms pulling me into the house. **

**"Come on in, the family can't wait to meet Elizabeth," she said knowingly. I laughed and gestured for the couple to enter while being dragged into the living room by Alice. Edward trailed behind us his eyes excited by the events that was about to unfold. Alice looked at Edward for a moment and he nodded. He turned to Elizabeth and whispered in her ear something I couldn't make out. I reached the family now and I stood at the entryway next to... Alice went over to sit down and the person next to me was now Elizabeth. Her eyes turned gold now and she stood exactly the same way I did her face strained a bit trying to repress inner laughter. I looked at the family and struggled to hold my own laughing attack from happening too. **

**Author's Note: Review please so I know whether or not this is worth continuing. **


	4. Explanation

**Author's Note: Elizabeth's eye color is associated with her power. She too can change her appearance with the exception of her eye color kind of like an imcomplete shapeshift. But she can't do it for long, probably just a couple of hours at most. I haven't decided just exactly what she is or why she looks like Bella so don't ask. This chap was done quite a while ago but I couldn't load it into the Document Manager so sorry for the delay.**

**Disclaimer: You need your head examined if you think I own Twilight.**

_**Hide and Seek**_

**They looked at us with total confusion as if we were alien beings. Edward already broke down into a laughing attack and Henry was struggling to keep a straight face too. Emmett got up and walked over to us examining us closely and even sniffing to find out what was going on. Elizabeth suddenly morphed into a second Emmett causing him to jump and me to shriek. She looked exactly like Emmett but her eyes were still the leafy green it was before. She laughed at the reactions she received and turned back to normal. **

**"Hi, I'm Elizabeth, Bella's lost twin," she said holding out her hand to Emmett. He held out his hand hesitantly not knowing if she will change again.**

**"Lost twin?" He asked looking over at me questioningly.**

**"She was joking Emmett. She's a 100 years older than me," I explained. He took his hand from hers and resigned to his seat next to Rosalie.**

**"Everyone please grab a seat," Carlisle sounded gesturing at the empty seats around the room. I went over to grab a seat at the sofa next to Alice and Jasper but Edward stopped me and sat himself down first and placed me on his lap wrapping his arm around me. Henry and Elizabeth sat themselves on the chairs next to the sofa where we sat.**

**"Elizabeth, you can shapeshift?" Carlisle asked starting us off. She nodded politely.**

**"Except my eyes stay the same. I can only do it for a couple of hours before I change back," she added. "Can I ask why your eyes are gold instead of the usual red?" she said nervously.**

**"Because of our diet. We prefer hunting animals to people," he answered with a smile. So Henry never told her. She never noticed because his eyes are always blue now.**

**"Animal?" Her eyes grew wide with interest and she leaned in towards Carlisle.**

**"Yes. It doesn't completely stop the thirst but it does keep us strong enough to resist the humans." Carlisle continued to explain our lifestyle to her and she continued to ask questions until the sun started getting low bringing shades of red and orange through the window. **

**"It's getting late, I'm sure you would like to unpack. Would you like to stay here with us or would you like to go back to Henry's house?" Carlisle wondered. She considered it for a moment.**

**"Bella, where are you staying?" she asked me suddenly. Edward chuckled and I hit him in the arm lightly.**

**"I'm staying here since Edward never wants to leave me alone." I replied.**

**"Okay then, I guess we'll stay here. If that's okay." **

**"Of course it is!" Alice said getting up from her seat and grabbing Elizabeth. "Come on, I'll show you to your rooms." She bounded up the stairs leaving Henry to gather the bags.**

**"Edward." I said.**

**"I know dear," he got up and helped Henry lug the bags up to the room. I turned to Carlisle and realized that he was looking at me too. Esme gave me a motherly smile and joined the others upstairs. **

**"Carlisle, do you know why we look so much alike?" I asked hoping he would have some clue. Unfortunately, he shook his head.**

**"No Bella, I don't know why. There are many unexplainable things in this world," he stated. "But it doesn't matter all that much so go and join the party upstairs," he laughed and got up with me and walked upstairs too. Esme met Carlisle at the top step and they went to their room together and Edward swept me into his arms and ran to the bedroom.**

**"Edward, what is it now?" I shrieked. He laughed evilly and dropped me onto the bed. I finally caught on and slammed the door shut with my mind before he pounced at me. I slipped away at the last second and darted to the other side of the room. "I'm not going down without a fight." He grinned mischieviously.**

**"I was hoping you'd say that," he growled and came at me. I ducked and raced to the bathroom but he caught my sleeve and pulled me into his chest. He leaned down to kiss me but I turned so he ended up pecking my cheek instead. Then I heard a thud in the next room, Henry's room, and a playful shriek similiar to mine. Edward and I laughed. I felt his arms loosen as he laughed and slipped out running to the door. It flew open when I got there and I ran into the hallway seeing Elizabeth do the same but in my direction. We winked at each other and continued running, me into Henry's room and she into Edward's. I slammed the door shut behind me and turned to face Henry. His face was confused and shocked.**

**"You came back?" he asked. I repressed a smile while listening to any noise next door.**

**"Yes I did," I answered stepping away from the door and towards the chair into the corner. I got halfway there before the door swung open revealing Edward and Elizabeth. She had a huge smile on her face clearly planning something but didn't try to run.**

**"I believe she is yours, and if you don't mind, I will be taking Bella now," he said stepping towards me. I backed up into the wall and he locked his mesmerizing eyes onto me. He bent down and lifted me onto his shoulders and carried me back to our room. **

**"Enough hide and seek, Bella." He kicked the door closed, placed me onto the bed, and dropped himself on top of me. He swept my hair back to expose my neck and began planting kisses on it. Every kiss still sent electricity throughout my body and I gave him no more resistance. He relaxed and placed his whole weight on me pulling me closer and closer between kisses.**

**Author's Note: Things are a bit slow right now but they will pick up soon. **


	5. Shopping

**Author's Note: I've had this chapter written on paper for a couple of days now but I was getting too lazy in between work and chores so I procrastinated typing this up. **

**Disclaimer: I am unworthy of owning Twilight so I don't.**

**Shopping**

**I laid comfortably in Edward's arms wrapped in nothing but the blanket with my back to him. We laid there in silence just basking in the sunlight pouring through the window lighting the tiny diamonds imbedded in our skin until I heard a knock at the door. "Edward," I groaned attempting to get up. He sighed, digging his face deeper into my hair and tightened his grip on my hip. After a few moments of struggling, I came to the conclusion that he wasn't planning on letting go anytime soon. I merely readjusted my position so that I had a clear view of the door without disturbing his position. The knock came again, this time it was louder and more urgent. **

"**What is it?" I said loud enough for whoever it is on the other side of the door to hear.**

"**Um Bella? Alice and Rosalie wanted me to come get you to come with us to get the dress." Dress? Oh right, Elizabeth's dress. Edward turned out of my hair and towards the door.**

"**You three go ahead but Bella is staying here today," he answered with authority. I heard shuffling on the other side of the doorway and then there was several more knocks.**

"**Bella? Is he holding you hostage? Edward Cullen, don't make me go in there and get her myself!" Rosalie mocked. I laughed but saw the doorknob turn an inch and stopped immediately. Edward jumped off and ran to the closet to put pants on just in case she does decide to come in. **

"**Rosalie, don't come in. Go downstairs and wait for me, I'll be down in 20 minutes!" That stopped the movement of the doorknob and I sighed with relief. **

"**Okay," she replied. I heard her walk away and got up to gather the scattered clothes on the floor to drop into the basket. I hopped in the shower and turned the water on boiling hot letting it refresh me for the day before getting out. I wrapped myself securely in a towel before stepping out to blow dry my hair. I reached over to the counter for my clothes but didn't find it. Oops, I forgot to bring in fresh clothes. I walked over to the door and peeked it open. I searched the room for Edward but didn't find him. I figured that he went downstairs to join the others so I stepped out and walked over to our giant walk-in closet. My clothes were hung and folded on the right and Edward's were on the left, splitting the closet equally between the two of us. I headed to the drawers that held my undergarments but something grabbed me and pulled me backwards. **

"**Do you know how tempting you are right now?" He whispered in my ear and began sliding his lips back and forth on my neck causing me to tremble slightly. "You really shouldn't walk around with nothing but a towel on."**

"**I thought you went downstairs," I giggled.**

"**I did but Alice was starting to wonder what was taking you so long," he mocked.**

"**Then I'd better get going." I pulled away from him and continued to the drawers to grab a pair of underwear, bra, jeans, and a comfortable t-shirt before running back into the bathroom. I slipped into my clothes and ran a brush through my hair a couple of times before going downstairs. As soon as I got to the last step of the stairs, Alice raced to me from her seat, grabbed my arm, and dragged me towards the front door. **

"**Finally! Let's go ladies!" She yelled. Elizabeth and Rosalie rose from their seats and began following us. Alice swung the door open just as Edward caught up with us and pecked me on the cheek goodbye. Alice continued dragging me out to the car opening the door of the passenger seat for me to get in.**

"**Have fun!" Edward said from the doorway chuckling. I rolled my eyes and got in the car as Alice walked to the other side of the car to get into the driver's seat. Elizabeth and Rosalie got in the back with Rosalie chattering about how the dresses look and how we should do our hair. Alice started the car and pulled out of the driveway easily, in no time, we were headed to the only shopping center in this tiny town. Now Rosalie was talking about how the guys proposed three months ago making me smile ear to ear at the memory.**

"**Wait, if all three of them proposed at the same time, why didn't you decide to get married together?" Elizabeth asked curiously. Rosalie and Alice laughed and I shook my head slightly.**

"**It was Edward's idea. He wanted Bella to have the perfect wedding day with her in the center of attention and no one else," Rosalie mocked. Alice pulled into the parking space in front of the bridal shop and turned off the engine.**

"**Everyone out," she said pretending to be a bus driver. We piled out of the car slamming the doors shut with Rosalie leading the way into the shop. The same clerk from last time greeted us at the door.**

"**Hello again. What can I help you with today?" Rosalie stepped up from the group.**

"**We want another of the red bridesmaid dress we picked up last time," she said looking around for a glimpse of the dress we wanted.**

"**Of course, come this way," the clerk led us into the back room. "What size is it this time?" **

"**Four," Elizabeth answered automatically. The clerk grabbed the dress from a random hanger and handed it to me thinking I was Elizabeth. I grabbed it but passed it to Elizabeth and pointed her towards the dressing room. She got in and closed the door behind her looking excited about the dress.**

"**Bella, me and Rosalie wants to stop to get some lingerie, do you want to come?" I shook my head my eyes wide open.**

"**Okay then, you stay with Elizabeth. We'll meet back here in an hour." She and Rosalie trailed out quickly leaving me to help Elizabeth with her dress. The dressing room door opened and Elizabeth stepped out twirling a couple of times for me to see. I nodded and smiled at her before walking to the counter. **

"**Can you ring that dress and its accessories up for me?" I asked. **

"**The two ladies that were with you earlier already paid before they left ma'am." Typical Alice. Elizabeth finished changing and placed the dress carefully onto the counter.**

"**Oh Bella, you should let me pay for this," she reached for her wallet but I grabbed her wrist.**

"**We're too late, Alice already did," I stated. She laughed and the clerk handed us the dress bagged neatly.**

"**We'll come pick it up in an hour." The clerk nodded and placed the bag behind the counter while I led Elizabeth out. **

"**Where is Alice and Rosalie?" she wondered.**

"**They went lingerie shopping. They'll meet us here in an hour," I exclaimed. "In the meantime, why don't we do some shopping of our own?" She nodded and followed me down the boardwalk. **

**Author's Note: I am looking for an editor! Between work and everything I don't have the time to recheck my writing anymore. Anyone who is my editor won't have to work that hard since I usually don't make a lot of mistakes and they will get first looks at chapters!**


	6. Voice

**Author's Note: Okay, after very careful consideration I have come to the decision of who my editor is. And the winner is... (drum roll please) ... EdwardAddict! To everyone who offered thank you and I'm so very sorry. Though I will need a new editor for my next story so you can apply again when Loving Doubts is completed. I already have an idea bubbling in my brain screaming at me so it won't be long now. Thanks again!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. **

**Voice**

**Elizabeth and I entered the most expensive shop they had in this tiny town and started looking around in silence. I didn't really want to shop but we had to pass the time somehow. Elizabeth was looking at a black skirt intently for at least a minute now. "Elizabeth, that skirt looks very cute," I commented trying to help her decide. She looked up at me surprised.**

**"I know but I hate wearing black," she complained making a disgusted face. I laughed and nodded.**

**"So does Edward," she joined me laughing causing several clerks to look up from their screens. We continued through several racks of clothes, not finding anything we liked. **

**"Bella?" She said suddenly. I looked up from the line of clothes I was looking at and focused on her. **

**"Hm?" I answered.**

**"Henry told me about you and Edward's past..." she trailed off turning her gaze towards the floor. **

**"What is it?" I said coming over to her and lifted her chin so she faced me. **

**"It's just that I've had boyfriends before but they all ended up smashing my heart into a million pieces. I know that Henry isn't like them but I just can't seem to bring myself to have faith in him. How did you do it?" her words were coming out at such speeds that only another vampire could hear but she wasn't doing it on purpose. I looked at her, puzzled. What did she mean by that? **

**"How did I do what?" **

**"How did you begin to trust Edward again after he left you?" She said hesitantly. That hit me like an airplane. I've never thought about that. Since Edward and I got back together, there was this tiny voice in my head I pushed in the very back of my brain and stopped listening to. Now, it came back full force screaming in my head. Elizabeth saw my pained facial features and came closer to me.**

**"Bella? Are you okay? I didn't mean to mention that. I'm so sorry," she whispered ashamed. It wasn't her fault. I forced a smile onto my face and shook my head at her.**

**"It's okay, I'm fine." Amazingly, my voice didn't break and it sounded convincing. Her eyes lit up again and she resumed looking at the clothes. I did too but I didn't really see what I was passing through my hands, I was drowning in my thoughts. _You know she's right. You still don't trust him and you never will. What if he isn't there when you get home? Do you want to go through that pain again? How can you marry someone you don't trust?_ I didn't know the answers to those questions. The last one spun around me demanding an answer. My cell phone rang in my pocket. I reached in and pulled it out to look at who was calling. Alice. I slid it open and pushed the answer button.**

**"Hello?" **

**"Bella, where are you and Elizabeth?" Alice said distractedly.**

**"Um we're at the shop down the street. We'll be there as soon as possible," I slid the phone shut and went over to Elizabeth. **

**"Found anything?" I asked. She shook her head sighing. "Okay then, we have to get back to the bridal shop. Alice and Rosalie are waiting for us there," she nodded and we walked to the door. We walked in silence, me deep in my own thoughts and Elizabeth looking at the window displays at the places we passed. When we got there Alice and Rosalie were waiting right outside the door with bags in their hands.**

**"What, you didn't get anything?" Rosalie asked surprised. I shook my head amused at her disbelief.**

**"Wait, I have to get the dress from the clerk," I said walking past them into the bridal shop. Alice grabbed me and turned me around to face her. **

**"We already got it, see?" She said holding up the bag and shaking it a couple of times. I smiled and took it from her. She led us back to the car and popped the trunk for us to throw the stuff into the trunk. Rosalie placed her shopping bags in first and Alice followed, when it was my turn, I placed the dress carefully on top and closed the trunk shut. As soon as I got in and pulled the door to a close, Alice pulled out onto the street and pointed the car home. I turned on the radio to extinguish the silence or the conversations that involved my participation. 'Behind These Hazel Eyes' came on. I laughed to myself at how ironic this sound is to my own situation. When the song ended, we were home. I got out and headed into the house letting the others carry the bags. I raced upstairs into my room hoping the sight of Edward would remind me of why I forgave him and silence the voice in my head again. I opened the door and found no Edward, all that was there was a single red rose on top of a piece of paper placed on the bed. The events from ten years ago flashed before my eyes and my heart was ripping apart at the memory of that day. I gasped suddenly unable to breath even though I didn't need to. _I told you. Now do you trust him? He left you again. Why did you let yourself get hurt again? How can you marry him now? _**

**Author's Note: Review or it shall take me a while to post the next chapter. **


	7. Flight

**Author's Note: I'm sorry if you think I am evil to use the cliffhangers but I had no idea what to write next until another idea pops into my head. Well, here we go again. **

**Disclaimer: I so don't own Twilight. **

**Flight**

**I shook my head furiously to clear my mind again and went over to the bed. The rose was placed on a folded piece of paper with my name written neatly on it in his penmanship. I picked up the rose slowly almost afraid to think it was real. I placed it to the side, took the paper in my shaking hands, and unfolded it. My eyes closed shut on its own freewill as soon as the words were visible. _What if this is another goodbye?_ I didn't matter what it was, I had to know. I forced my eyelids open and stared at the paper. **

_**Bella, **_

_**I have gone to Canada to invite some of the family friends to the wedding. I thought it would be a bit rude if we just sent them an invitation. I didn't think you should come with me since you needed to put the finishing touches on the wedding plans. I apologize for not telling you first, I was a bit preoccupied this morning. I will be back in a few days. I will miss you very much. Let the rose remind you of me until I come back. **_

_**Love, **_

**_Edward._ **

**I sighed in relief. You still can't trust him. If you trusted him you wouldn't have been that scared. Can you really commit yourself to someone you can't trust? I wanted so much to say yes but who would I be kidding? I had to face the fact that I didn't trust him still. I will always have that voice in the back of my head whispering my doubts. I can't do this anymore. I crunched the letter inside my fist and made my decision. I needed to go away for a while to think about this. I couldn't continue to face these people and lie to them. What I didn't know was when I was coming back or if I was coming back at all. I strode over to the desk at the corner of the room and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen. **

_**I need to get away for a while to rearrange my thoughts. Please don't come after me. I don't know when I'm coming back or where I'm going. Tell Edward that I love him no matter where I am going or where I end up. I love you all very much but I can't lie to you anymore. **_

**_Bella._ **

**I folded the paper, grabbed my purse with all the necessary traveling papers in it, and went into the hallway. Alice, Rosalie, and Elizabeth were in Rosalie's closet probably trying to find space for her new clothes. Jasper and Emmett was hunting and won't be back until nightfall. Carlisle was at the hospital and Esme was in the backyard planting new flowers in the back. Good, there was no one here that I had to face. I made my way silently down the stairs and taped the letter to the TV where I was sure one of the guys would actually see it. I crept towards the door, opened it soundlessly, and slipped out. My car was parked next to Alice's making it easy for me to leave without notice. I got in the driver's seat and started the engine; thank goodness this engine was quiet. I pulled out of the driveway and headed to the airport. Where was I going? It didn't really make a big difference, I just needed to be alone a while. I slid open my cell phone and dialed 411. **

"**_Hello, this is information. Can I help you?"_ **

"**Yes, can I get the phone number for the airport?" **

"_**Of course, would you like me to give you the number or transfer you?" **_

"**Transfer." **

"**_Alright, one moment please."_ There was annoying music playing for a moment before a click. **

"_**Hello, this is the Raymond International Airport. May I help you?"**_

**"Yes, I'd like to book a ticket to...Forks, Washington." I didn't know why I decided to go there but it just clicked in my mind. The woman continued to ask my information for the ticket and I gave it to her without hesitation. **

_**"Thank you Miss Swan. Your ticket to Forks, Washington is booked for 4:00 today. The information desk will have it ready for you, just come by and pick it up."**_

**"Thank you." I slid the phone closed and glanced at the clock. Perfect, 3:30. I pulled into the parking lot of the airport and parked my car. I didn't really care about what would happen to the car if I left it here so I just got out and entered through one of the doors. I turned to the left and made my way to the large counter marked Information Desk.**

**"I'm Isabella Swan, I have a ticket booked for Forks, Washington at 4 today," I informed. The girl behind the counter looked at me in shock as if I was some miracle or something. I cleared my throat on purpose snapping her out of daydream.**

**"Oh yes," she stammered shuffling through a drawer on her right. A moment later, she popped her head back up and handed me the hard pieces of paper. "Here you go Miss Swan." I muttered a thank you and walked away searching for the gate that I was supposed to be at. My flight was assigned to gate 6, when I got there first class was already boarding. I handed the flight attendant my ticket for her to check. She nodded without looking up at me and pointed me into the gate. I followed the arrows onto the plane and took my seat by the window. My cell phone vibrated in my pocket disturbing my train of thoughts. I reached in and pulled it out and the name Alice appeared as the caller ID. I let out a sigh and took the battery off the back causing it to flick off. I replaced the battery and pushed it back into my pocket. The regular passengers were boarding the plane now and the flight attendants shuffled around helping them put luggage into the overhead compartment. I placed my back against the seat and closed my eyes letting my thoughts overtake me. **

**I didn't open my eyes until the plane landed at the Forks airport. I didn't know they even had an airport in Forks since I hadn't been there since ten years ago but apparently they built one a few years back for convenience purposes. Once I got into the airport I headed to the information desk again. "Excuse me, can you help me book a hotel room and get a rental car?" I asked the man behind the counter. His eyes glazed over and he stared at me stupidly. There was something awfully familiar about him. He had blue eyes and blond hair and was in his late 20s. "Mike?" I asked finally remembering. He snapped out of his stupor at the mention of his name.**

**"How do you know my name?" He said suspiciously. I laughed lightly as he stared at me blankly. I was about to tell him who I was but I suddenly remembered that I had faked my death and it was best if he couldn't recognize me.**

**"Um, it's written on your name tag," I lied quickly. He looked down at his chest.**

**"Oh right," he muttered. "You said you wanted to book a hotel room and rent a car?" I nodded in agreement and he proceeded to punch keys onto his computer. "Your name miss?" Uh oh, I couldn't tell him my real name. Wait, yes I can. He'll just think it's a coincidence. Who would believe that I hadn't aged a day and became more beautiful after 10 years? **

**"Isabella Swan," I said with confidence. He looked up from the computer screen and rose one of his eyebrows at me. I reached into my purse, pulled out an ID, and handed to him. He glanced it over while I focused on not laughing. **

**"That's weird. I had a high school girlfriend named Isabella Swan." _When was I his girlfriend? _Never, that's when. I wanted to punch him lying like that but restrained myself from it. He continued typing into the computer for another minute. "Credit card?" I pulled out a random card and slipped it onto the counter. He grabbed it looking a bit disappointed about something but turned to enter the information in. After he was done, he pulled the several pieces of paper from the printer on his right and placed it on the counter. "This is the hotel information. The address is in red for your convenience. All you have to do is give them these papers and they will hand you the keys to your hotel room. Also, here is your car rental information. It is waiting for you in the front with this license plate. And here are your keys," he said dropping a set of keys onto the stack of papers. I signed the release forms for the car, grabbed my ID and credit card, and turned to go. "Miss Isabella?" I turned around to face him again. "I'm off in about 15 minutes, do you wanna go out to dinner or something?" I struggled to compose my expression so that I didn't look suspicious. _Did he just ask me out?_**

**"No thanks. I'm engaged," I held out my hand for him to see the ring on my finger with a forced smile on my face. His face fell and I turned on my heel and walked away towards the door. I didn't really know if I was lying or telling the truth. If I was still engaged, shouldn't I be back in Canada plannning my wedding? Was I still engaged if I left and was having second thoughts? Exactly what Mike had said, there was a silver Camry waiting for me in the front with the same license plate as the one on the paper. I got in and punched in the address on the navigation system. How nice for them to have one available. I pulled out and followed the instructions of the machine to the hotel I was booked at. **

**The hotel was clearly one for the upper class of tourists. It was more extravagant and even had valet parking. I handed the dazed valet my keys and grabbed the ticket from his hand before he can utter a word. I pushed the doors open and strode over to the desk and gave them the papers.**

**"Welcome Ms. Swan, we've been expecting you. You are one of our honored guests, please inform us if you need anything. Your room is on the 10th floor, 5th door on the right." She sounded like she was an actor delivering bad lines. She gave me a key card and smiled sweetly at me. I flicked around and walked towards the dinging elevators. I pressed the button with the number 10 and the door close button not in the mood for waiting or tag-alongs. The doors pulled to a lazy close and I felt it rise. It opened after another moment and I stepped out to the dim lit hallway of the hotel rooms. I counted 5 doors on the right and slipped the key card into the slot. The red light turned green so I turned the knob swinging the door open. I got in and kicked the door closed behind me with a loud bang. I dropped my purse on the floor and collapsed faced down on the bed. _What do I do next?_ **

**Author's Note: Review! **


	8. Memory Lane

**Author's Note: So the story has gone full circle ending up where the whole thing started. Forks! **

**Disclaimer: For the… I don't know how many times but I just don't own Twilight. **

**Memory Lane **

**I must've lied there for hours because when I flipped over on my back the room was much darker than before since the sun had gone down for the day (not that it showed itself much in this town). I glanced at my digital clock on the tiny table by the bed; it was 9:00 already. I had to make sure that I wasn't being hunted down my family so I turned my cell phone back on and dialed 123 to retrieve my voice mail. I had three messages each of them an hour apart. **

**Bella! It's Alice, please pick up. What is going go in that head of yours? You have to let us know what's wrong so we can help you figure something out. Edward's on his way back home and I don't think your letter is a very good explanation for him. Call me back. **

**They can't help me through this, no one can. **

**Bella, why haven't you called my back? Edward is tearing the house apart in frustration and I don't know how much longer we can keep him from going to find you wherever you are. I know you need to be alone a while but you have to let us know that you're okay or at least talk to Edward so he can calm down. **

**She didn't know that if I talked to Edward, I'd lash out at him in unreasonable anger for something I told him he was already forgiven for. I couldn't talk to anyone of them until I've sorted out my own feelings. **

**Isabella Marie Swan, where are you! I just left for a few hours and you've ran off to rearrange your thoughts without a definite date of when you're coming back? Whatever the reason is, I want you to come home and talk to me about it... Bella, I can't lose you again. It tore me apart the first time and it's tearing me apart now. If this is because you don't love me like you once did then that would be…quite fair but you need to tell me that in person. If I don't receive a call from you within 72 hours, I am going to track you down even if it's the last thing I ever do. **

**He sounded devastated. I wanted to let him know that I still loved him like I have always loved him and possibly more, but that tiny voice defied against that thought. **

**My angel had given me 3 days to give him an answer but is that enough? **

**I turned off me cell phone again and slipped it back into my pocket. I got up from the bed, grabbed my purse, and was out the door in less than a second. I got into the elevator and pushed the button for the first floor and waited impatiently for it to get there. Once the doors opened wide enough, I slipped through and headed for the hotel doors. I walked human speed until I was out of sight of anyone who was paying attention and began running. **

**I was at the edge of the woods where the meadow was in less than five minutes. I hadn't been here in 10 years and this place is why I became what I am today. I took a deep unnecessary breath and took off again. Now that I was a vampire, finding the meadow wasn't a problem at all, and I was there in a couple of minutes. It was exactly how I remembered it; the ground was still full of wild flowers and grass swaying in the breeze. I sank down by a tree trunk and stared at the ground remembering the events that occurred in this very spot. **

**This was the spot where our relationship took a drastic turn and he revealed to me his true self for the very first time. This was also the place that gave me hope for our relationship and it was also there to take it away from me when he left. I picked a flower nearest to me. It was wilted and near its end, showing only slightly the beauty of what it once was. Maybe love is the same way, it's only pretty when it first blooms but it dies with time leaving nothing but the scar it inflicted upon your heart. I dropped the flower at my feet and got up to leave. I took one last glance at the circular field and ran back where I came. **

**The scent of nearby deer caught in my nose causing the venom in my mouth to increase in hunger. I had all night so I might as well satiate my thirst. I gave myself into my senses and let my nose guide me to the vulnerable deer. I pounced on it and sank my teeth into its neck. The warm blood ran down my throat smoothly rejuvenating my energy. I did the same with another two deers and an unfortunate bear. I disposed of the bodies underneath a tree which I uprooted and replanted with my mind. I had always been a very clean hunter and didn't get a speck of blood on my clothes or the side of my mouth. **

**The sun was rising now, casting shades of yellow, orange, and red onto the sky like a beautiful painting by nature. I climbed on a tree and sat myself on one of its branches near the top to watch the steady but sure sunrise. The sunrise has been the same thing since the first days of this earth no matter how the creatures on it have changed over the years. I sat there staring at the sky until the sun was already on top of the sky indication noon. Clouds hung around covering most of the sunlight from reaching the ground below shielding me from being exposed. I jumped down from the tree and ran back to the edge of the woods and towards the hotel. I began walking at human speed when I got close to where people would be until I reached the double doors to the hotel room. I pulled it open and walked in ignoring the greeting of the girl at the desk, headed to the elevator, and pressed the button. When the door dinged open, I saw a guy standing outside of my hotel room with his back turned to me. **

**I walked cautiously towards him examining his stance and trying to figure out who he was. He had blond hair and was a bit taller than me. There were two bags by his side laid against the wall. When I got within ten feet, he turned around abruptly and met my eyes with his own. **

"**Henry?" I said surprised. He smiled and nodded. I looked around frantically searching for any sign of Alice, Edward, or any other Cullen for that matter. **

"**Don't worry Bella. I didn't bring anyone. They didn't even know where I went, not even Elizabeth." I sighed in relief and met his gaze again. **

"**How did you find me?" I asked curiously. He laughed lightly and shook his head. **

"**Can I at least come in first?" **

"**Oh, yeah, sure." I walked to the door and slipped the card into it. When the light turned green, I pushed it open and walked in. He lifted his bags from the ground and set it down by the bed closing the door behind him. **

"**Bella, why did you run off?" He asked out of nowhere. **

"**You have to answer my question first," I bargained trying to buy myself some time. He sighed and nodded. "How did you find me?" I repeated. **

"**Bella, don't forget that before I met you I was a decent tracker. Finding you isn't that hard. Besides, you used your ID and credit card which happens to be the one I got for you. I called in and was informed you booked a ticket to Forks so I came to see what exactly provoked you to leave," he explained. "So why did you run off?" I turned my gaze to the ground and searched my brain for any reasons to why I should lie to him but found none. **

"**I... just realized that I don't trust Edward at all," I muttered. "I can't go back. I can't marry someone I don't have any faith in." His eyes were very understanding and he nodded. **

"**I never said you had to come back. Yet," he reassured with a smile. We were quiet for a moment before he started back to the bed and grabbed a suitcase. I realized that it was one of mine. I always had one packed just in case of unexpected trips or a human gets too close to the truth. "I knew that you left without packing any clothes or someone would've noticed so I took the liberty of bringing you some necessities. I assume you would want to take a shower now?" I nodded happily. He handed the briefcase to me and I grabbed some clothes before running into the bathroom. **

**I let the water run for a moment before I stripped and jumped in, taking a bath instead of a shower. I heard the TV turn on outside and assumed that Henry was getting caught up on his sports news. I relaxed, slid my head into the water holding my breath, and cleared my brain. I had two days left to give Edward an answer that I didn't have yet. **

**Author's Note: What do you think? Review. **


	9. Realization

**Author's Note: For once in all of my stories I have no idea how the ending will be. Now, don't panic. I still believe this will be a happy ending but I'm just not sure how I will get there.**

**Disclaimer: Roses are red... um let's not go there with the roses. I just don't own Twilight so just don't sue.**

**Love is Trust**

**Once I got out of the bathroom I saw that Henry was spread out on the bed with his shoes on staring intently at the TV. I was working a towel through my hair, drying it as much as I could without a blow dryer. I looked over to the TV and saw a couple of good sized guys running across the court trying to put a ball through a hoop hung several feet above the ground. I shook my head in disaprroval. I never understood why guys were into this stuff, it was mindless not to mention pointless. I went back into the bathroom to retrieve my cell phone and check my messages but there were none. That's strange. When I stepped out again, Henry flicked the TV off and turned to me, suddenly serious again. **

**"As much as I'd like to enjoy the basketball game, I have to remember why I was here," he stated patting the spot on the bed next to him. I went over and sat down next to him wordlessly and a bit afraid of what he was going to say. "Okay, here I go. I've never done this sort of thing so bare with me." He paused for a moment seeming to be a bit uncomfortable. **

**"Henry, you don't have to do this," I muttered. He met my eyes and shook his head. **

**"Bella, we both know that if no one talks to you about this you'll never figure it out yourself," he chuckled without humor. "Let's start with something easy. Do you or do you not love Edward?" I stared at him blankly.**

**"Of course I do."**

**"Then what's the problem?" He said a bit confused.**

**"The problem is that I will always have that voice in the back of my head wondering if he will be there when I need him or if he will leave again," I sighed. **

**"You're still mad at him for leaving ten years ago?" he guessed. I shook my head.**

**"No, it's not that. I forgave him for that a long time ago but I'm still unsure of whether he will do the same thing twice." He laughed at my comment but got serious again afterwards.**

**"Bella, who do you think of when you're sad?"**

**"Edward."**

**"Who do you think of when you're lonely?"**

**"Edward."**

**"Happy?"**

**"Edward."**

**"Don't you see Bella? You love him so much, he's always on your mind. And love is trust, Bella. You trusted him with your heart, that's why you gave it to him. You gave it to him again when he came back. Bella, I was by your side for eight years and you never opened up to let me in because of him. Don't you think there's a reason for that? Don't you think that deep inside you knew all along that he was coming back for you? I don't know everything about your past but I know that Edward left because he thought it was what was best for you no matter how stupid that thought was. Bella, cold feet is perfectly natural before a wedding but this is getting ridiculous." **

**I had answered each one of his question without a second thought and they were the truth. Everything he said was hitting home and causing charges to be sent to my brain. Everything made perfect sense and the voice in my head was speechless and I was pretty sure I wouldn't hear from it again. I sighed and blinked a couple of times before staring Henry in the eyes.**

**"Thank you, Henry, for everything." I swung myself at him and gave him a hug. **

**"You're very welcome. You are sort of my sister after all," he said hugging me back a bit surprised at my sudden display of affection. "So, that means you're coming back?" I nodded fiercely and my chin bobbed up and down on his shoulder. "Great! I'll book us tickets for tomorrow morning." I pulled away and laughed in agreement. I reached over and grabbed the phone. I walked back into the bathroom to gather up the dirty clothes and repack the briecase. Henry chatted on the phone for about 10 minutes while I shuffled around in the briefcase trying to find a hair brush. **

**"Okay, Bella. Our flight is at 6:00 in the morning. That's as early as I could get it," he announced hanging up the phone.**

**"That's all right. I'm really in no rush." I really wasn't. He did give me three days and even though I really want to see him, I still had plenty of time. **

**"You wanna call them to reassure them we'll be back tomorrow late morning?" I shook my head and winked at him.**

**"I want it to be a surprise," I said. He nodded and flicked the TV on and continued watching sports like he did before. I parked myself in the chair near the window and stared at the full moon looming behind some thin clouds. I was going home and I was going to get married to my one true love. I smiled at the thought of Edward in a tuxedo waiting for me at the end of the aisle with his trademark crooked smile.**

**Author's Note: This is nowhere near the end yet. Loving Doubts is just starting to get interesting. Review.**


	10. Going Home

**Author's Note: Just to make sure, the problems that lie ahead for them is BIG. So don't hate me for it, I will make everything work out eventually.**

**Disclaimer: As sure as Bella loves Edward, I don't own Twilight.**

**Going Home**

**At 5:00, I dragged Henry off the bed, clicked the TV off, and handed him the luggage. He groaned but took it from me and carried it to the elevator without a word. I closed the door and joined him just as the doors were closing. **

**"Bella, do you want me to return the room or do you want to?" Henry asked.**

**"I'll do it. Do you have a car?" He nodded.**

**"I rented one at the airport. I guess I'll meet you there then. Gate 13 okay?" The doors opened and I nodded at him. We separated, him going out of the hotel and I headed to the front desk.**

**"Hi, I'm returning my room," I said pleasantly handing the girl my key card. She took it and nodded before turning to the computer to calculate my bill. I was in a very good mood this morning so her slow movements didn't really bother me much. She finished and printed two receipts which she placed on the counter to face me.**

**"Your total is $523.59. Sign here and this is your copy." I grabbed the pen and scribbled my signature on the line before grabbing my receipt and turning to leave. The girl must've have somehow notified the valet because when I got out the door my rental car was already parking at the front waiting for me. I slipped the valet a 20 for tip and got in my car. I started the engine and stepped on the gas heading for the exit. Once I hit the main highway I was going at 150 mph with only one hand on the wheel and the other trying to pry my cell phone out of my pocket. **

**I turned it on and dialled my voice mail. The overly friendly voice of a women came on and told me I had no messages. I was getting a bit worried, why haven't I received any messages? What's going on? I slid the phone closed not bothering to turn it off this time. I was going home in a couple of hours anyway, what's the use?**

**Once I got to the airport, I parked the car right in front of the doors and stepped out. I made my way to the information desk and saw that Mike was working there again. I smiled at him as I approached and saw his eyes glaze over for a moment before he shook his head and snapped himself out if it. I pulled the rental papers out of my purse and placed it on the counter so he wouldn't have an excuse to touch my hand. His smile fell with disappointment and he gathered the papers up sourly.**

**"I'm returning the car," I stated. He looked up at me with a curious expression.**

**"Already?" He asked.**

**"There's an emergency at home," I lied casually. He nodded pretending to be understanding and started to type things into his computer. He gave me the total soon after but I wasn't paying attention, I was preoccupied with the ticking clock that was reading 5:30 and time for my plane to start boarding passengers. I handed him the cash that I had in my purse so that time wouldn't have to be wasted with the credit card information. "No change," I stated, turned, and speed walked at human speed to gate 10. **

**Henry was waiting for me at the gate and handed me the ticket when I got there. "What was taking you so long?" He asked. I snorted and rolled my eyes.**

**"Don't ask."**

**We handed the flight attendant our tickets and followed the other passengers onto the plane. Henry had booked first class tickets so the seat was comfortable and big. I relaxed while he pushed our luggage into the overhead compartment and slammed it shut without help. I drowned out the noise around me and concentrated on what I would say to Edward when I got home. I guess there's no reason not to tell him the truth but how would I word this so that I he wouldn't misunderstand? I was so deep in thought that I didn't even realize the plane took off until we were three quarters of the way there. Henry must've realized what I was thinking because he took my hand and squeezed it assuringly.**

**"Don't worry Bella. He'll understand, he loves you too much not to," he whispered in my ear. I sighed and smiled. He placed his headphones back on and turned the volume back up. **

**I got up and opened the overhead compartment and my bag to pull out my iPod. I turned it on and pushed the earphones into my ear and let the music relax me. It wasn't until Henry nudged me in the shoulder that I opened my eyes again. Everyone was dragging their bags behind them and making their way off the plane. I got up and followed Henry towards the exit excitedly. Once we got out of the gate, I practically ran to the car. Henry trailed behind me lugging the bags as if they weighed 2 pounds instead of 20. **

**Amazingly, my car hadn't been towed and was left exactly where I parked it before I left. I got in and Henry followed thowing the bags into the back with a loud thump. "Didn't you bring a car?" I asked him curiously. He shook his head slightly.**

**"No, it would've been noticible. I just ran all the way here, it was a bit faster than the car could've gone," he informed. I raised my eyebrow at him but stared the car and pulled out of the parking lot and headed home. I pushed the gas down hard and was going 180 mph my focus not really on the road. Henry didn't say anything either, he was deep in thought himself. I smiled as I realized he must be thinking of Elizabeth, he missed her too. With that knowledge, I sped up more and the trees on either side of the road whizzed by in a blur. In 20 minutes, I pulled into our driveway smoothly and cut the engine. I jumped out of the car and ran into the house at lightning speed. **

**Alice was right, Edward did tear up the house. Pieces of furniture were lying on the floor and shards of glass scattered the floor. No one was downstairs so I ran upstairs. Alice suddenly bursted through the door looking horror struck.**

**"Bella, no!" she screamed. Too late, I reached the top step and gasped at what I saw. Alice stopped behind me realizing that it was too late too, she sighed in defeat and made her way slowly to me. **


	11. Confirmed Doubts

**Author's Note: You may hate me after this chapter but you will just have to deal with it because it's gonna happen. **

**Disclaimer: I only own Twilight in my dreams.**

**Confirmed Doubts**

**I couldn't believe the data my eyes were sending to my brain but there it was nonetheless. I only saw it for a brief second before Edward realized that I had appeared and pulled away from Elizabeth. "Bella, it isn't what it you think!" he said urgently, horror stuck. I shook my head at him, if I was still capable of producing tears it would flow down my cheeks endlessly by now.**

**"Oh it isn't? I saw it with my own eyes, Edward," I replied turning around and flying back down the stairs. Alice looked very sorry she wasn't able to stop me from seeing this and didn't stand in my way. I swung the front door open with my mind and ran out towards the car. Henry was in the backseat gathering the clothes that spilled out of our luggage when he threw it in the back seat. He got out and straightened when he saw me come out of the house.**

**"Bella, what's wrong?" I couldn't tell him. It would break his heart like it just broke mine. I shook my head and took a in deep breath.**

**"Get in the car and drive!" I yelled. He seemed a bit frightened by my harsh tone and nodded quickly before climbing into the driver's seat. Edward caught up with me and grabbed me by the sleeve pulling me to face him. **

**"Bella, you have to let me explain," he began. "I was so frustrated and she walked in. She looks like you and I...just lost it." I wrenched my arm out of his grip but didn't look away from him.**

**"That is the lamest explanation I've ever heard in my life," I said walking away.**

**"Bella, can't we talk about this? I don't want to lose what we have between us over something so small," he said coming after me. I halted and turned around, surprising him.**

**"There is no _us_. I thought there was but there just wasn't," I whispered. I caught him off guard and he remained quiet as I made my way into the car and slammed the door shut.**

**"Bella-" Henry started.**

**"Drive," I muttered.**

**"But Bella, what happened?" **

**"Just drive!" I hissed. He started the car and pulled out instantly. _Why did he do that to me? How could he? I was just starting to believe that I could trust him and this happens._ The image of Edward attached to Elizabeth by the lips replayed over and over again in my head and I let out an involuntary whimper. **

**"Bella, you have to tell what's going on right now or we're turning around," Henry threatened slamming on the brakes in the middle of the road sending me flying forward a bit. I turned to look at him and realized that his expression was frustrated and a bit angry.**

**"You heard, didn't you?" I said softly. He nodded clenching his teeth together. I sighed in defeat, I had to tell him the truth now that he was suspicious. "I saw...Edward kissing Elizabeth when I went into the house," I sped through the last part as fast as I could hoping he couldn't hear me but he caught every word. He let out a low growl from his throat, something I've never seen him do before. He restarted the engine and made a sharp U-turn looking as if he could kill right now. "Henry?" I whispered. He kept absolutely silent with his eyes set on the road. "Henry, please say something if you're okay." He let out another growl and sped up even more. **

**We were pulling back into the Cullen's driveway in no time at all and Henry swung the door open causing it to fly across the yard and into the front window. He stalked towards the house his eyes pitch black from rage. The commotion with the window caused Alice, Edward, and Elizabeth to come out of the house. I got out of the car and ran to catch up with Henry. I knew that he was angry and is more than likely to resort to violence. When he was three feet from Edward, I placed myself between them and used myself as a shield for Edward. Henry didn't see me in time and threw his fist like a lightning strike and hitting me in the jaw. I screamed at the collision and fell back into Edward's arms.**

**"Bella!" Edward, Alice, and Elizabeth panicked simultaneously and ran over to me. Henry's eyes returned to its usual sea blue and he blinked a couple of times before joining them.**

**"Bella, I'm so sorry. I didn't see you there. I don't know what took over me but I just felt sheer rage and couldn't control myself," Henry babbled. I held up my hand to stop his flow of words and stood back up on my feet. I staggered at bit but was able to balance afterwards.**

**"I'm okay. Are you calm now?" I swept my hair out of my face and looked at him in concern. He nodded clearly still ashamed for actually taking a swing at me. Elizabeth went over to Henry's side hesitantly and a bit frightened.**

**"Um, can we talk?" she asked him lowly. He didn't look at her, his eyes remained on me asking for approval. I nodded and smiled at him telling him I was really okay and he could leave me to fend for myself. He turned to Elizabeth then and nodded curtly. She led him into the trees on the side of the house away from our hearing range.**

**"Bella?" Edward called. I flicked around and glared at him.**

**"What?" I snapped. His expression was unreadable and he wasn't looking into my eyes.**

**"Can we talk?" I opened my mouth to refuse but he suddenly looked up and I was suddenly under the full gaze of his golden eyes. "Please?" I sighed and nodded once. Somewhere in the course of events, Alice had retreated into the house to leave us alone. Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me into the woods behind the house. **

**After a couple of minutes, I got tired of walking and pulled my hand away from his and halted in place. I glared at him with the most hateful glare I could manage when he turned to face me. "We can talk right here. What do you want?" He looked reproachful but I was too enraged to let it get to me. He sighed and shook his head slowly. "What? So you don't want to talk now? Fine with me." I turned and began to walk back but he grabbed me and pulled me to him. **

**My breathing became heavy, partially because of the rage but also because of the sudden movement and its force. He laid his chin on my right shoulder and wrapped his arms around my waist. I could feel his chest movements on my back, heaving just as much as mine was. From the corner or my eye, I could see his were shut tight as if he was concentrating really hard on something. I struggled to free myself from him but he tightened his grip and pulled me closer.**

**"Give me a moment to memorize how it feels to hold you so that I wouldn't forget if you decide to leave me again," he whispered still keeping his eyes shut. I wanted to pull away but my mind told me it wouldn't hurt to give him and myself a few moments to engrave into our hearts before the end of things between us. **

**I really no longer had a drop of trust for him anymore even though I desperately wanted to. What I saw today was enough to confirm my doubts. It wasn't working between us anymore and I had to end while I'm still strong enough to.**

**Author's Note: Do you hate me now? If you don't then you will soon. I know it's heartbreaking, cause I cried while writing this chapter. (Not literally but on the inside) **


	12. Forever

Author's Note: Yes, I know how heartbreaking my fic has suddenly become, and yes, I do think it's sort of wrong, but I believe what doesn't kill you will make you stronger so Edward and Bella's relationship will only get stronger afterwards. I am very surprised at how many reviews I received after only 45 minutes of posting the last chapter. My mom was starting to get irritated while I was showering because my computer kept playing my new mail sound over and over again. LOL. People who want to throw Edward out the window for making up a lame excuse for kissing Elizabeth, it actually is the truth so hear him out before you judge him. Any other comments? Wow, this must be the longest note I've ever posted.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, just Elizabeth, Henry, and Troy.

Forever

I stood there still like a statue for a while longer just letting this moment linger in my thoughts before pulling away with all my strength and breaking his grip of me. He must've expected this because he didn't look at all surprised and didn't do anything to stop me. I kept a distance between us but turned to face him my eyes cold. His eyes were pleading and devastated like I've never seen before but I was shocked to see a hint of anger there too.

"Bella, why did you come back with Henry?" he murmured almost inaudible to even my ears. "How did he know where to find you and what were you two doing since he disappeared?" Was he assuming what I thought he was? He really thought I could do something like that?

"Edward, don't assume things that you have no proof of," I snapped angrily. His eyes turned the color of night and his expression became pained.

"What else am I supposed to think? You disappear without a word and then he does too. It can't all be a coincidence."

"Even if we did something, which we didn't, who are you to say anything? You were the one in lip lock with Elizabeth right in front of me!" I said coldly. In a flash, his face was in inch away from me the air escaping his nose blowing in my face. I was a bit dazed but the emotions raging in me refused the entire effect of his scent.

"Bella, I already explained that to you. You left and I just didn't know why, I wondered if it's because you finally realized that you didn't love me anymore after all these years. I began taking my frustration out on things until everyone else left, tired of having things thrown at them. Then, Henry disappeared too. I assumed the worst and it tore me apart inside. I just became more frustrated and angry that I couldn't even keep the one thing I love most beside me. That's when Elizabeth showed up. I wasn't thinking straight anymore, I thought she was you so I…"

"Kissed her right in front of me," I finished. I couldn't bring myself to believe him. "Edward, she may look like me but she doesn't smell like me. You can even read her thoughts! How do you expect me to believe you thought her to be me?" I glared at him standing my ground. He sighed and put his hands on my shoulder.

"Bella, every word coming out of my mouth is the truth. I admit that I shouldn't have let my emotions cloud my senses but you can't honestly believe that I would hurt you on purpose."

"Oh, but I do," I said pushing him away a few inches so I can twist the ring off my finger. "This morning, I was finally convinced myself that there's no reason not to trust you, but now I think otherwise. Now, I don't even have a speck of trust for you that I had before I left." I took his right hand and placed the ring in his palm before wrapping his fingers over it quickly. "I don't need this anymore because there won't be a wedding. At least not for us." The hardest part of this was not letting my voice crack and break down in tearless sobs. I pulled my arm away and turned around heading back in the direction we came. I could feel his eyes on my back but didn't hear him follow me as I made my way out of the forest. I didn't know when I started running but I suddenly felt my legs move at lightning speed underneath me. I whimpered like a dog in pain as the wind blew past my face and swept my hair back.

I escaped and ran into the house heading upstairs into Edward's room. I went into the closet and grabbed my bag and began throwing random stuff into it until it was full. I pulled the zipper shut and lifted it off the ground heading towards the door. I was stopped by Alice at the door, her eyes frantic.

"Bella, please don't do this! You guys can get through this," she said trying to take the briefcase from me. I pulled it out of her reach quickly.

"No, Alice we can't. This is the only choice I have left." I grabbed her and pushed her aside. I continued to out the door and downstairs with her trailing after me. "Bella, you have to believe Edward. He didn't mean to kiss Elizabeth, he was just confused." I stopped abruptly and turned to look at her.

"If you saw Jasper kissing someone else right in front of your eyes after you only left for a couple of days, could you believe him?" She paused before answering and I knew that she was about to lie. "That's what I thought." I resumed leaving and swung the doors open a bit too hard and it unhinged itself.

"But Bella, can't you at least hear both sides of the story?" she asked still trying to stop me.

"Who else's story do you want me to hear?" I couldn't imagine anyone else that can convince me that what I saw wasn't the truth.

"Elizabeth's." I snorted unbelievably. She actually wanted me to hear Elizabeth's story. Even if what Edward said was the truth, how could she convince me that Edward really thought she was me?

"Alice, there's nothing that she could possibly say to me to make me decide to stay," I replied getting into my car. I slammed the door shut and started the car. Henry had forgotten to take the keys out of the ignition in his fit of rage. "I'm sorry Alice; I just don't want to keep hearing more lies." She opened her mouth to speak but I was quicker. The car began to move out of the driveway and back into the road before she could utter a sound.

The feeling I felt when Edward left came back. I felt strangely empty inside, as if something was missing. I wanted tears to fall down from my eyes so that I could let all this pain out even just a little bit but I wasn't allowed even that. I was drowning in silent pain and I couldn't resurface. I turned on the radio to drown out my thoughts and stop the quiet that was beginning to surround me. To make everything a lot worse, Pink's 'Who Knew?' came on.

_You took my hand  
You showed me how  
You promised me you'd be around  
Uh huh  
That's right  
I took your words  
And I believed  
And everything  
You said to me  
Yeah huh  
That's right_

If someone said three years from now  
You'd be long gone  
I'd stand up and punch them up  
Cause they're all wrong  
I know better  
Cause you said forever  
And ever  
Who knew? 

Remember when we were such fools  
And so convinced and just too cool?  
Oh no  
No no  
I wish I could touch you again   
I wish I could still call you friend  
I'd give anything

When someone said count your blessings now  
For they're long gone  
I guess I just didn't know how  
I was all wrong  
They knew better   
Still you said forever  
And ever  
Who knew?

Yeah yeah  
I'll keep you locked in my head  
Until we meet again   
Until we  
Until we meet again  
And I won't forget you my friend  
What happened

If someone said three years from now   
You'd be long gone  
I'd stand up and punch them out  
Cause they're all wrong and  
That last kiss  
I'll cherish  
Until we meet again  
And time makes  
It harder  
I wish I could remember  
But I keep  
Your memory  
You visit me in my sleep   
My darling  
Who knew  
My darling  
My darling  
Who knew  
My darling  
I miss you  
My darling  
Who knew  
Who knew

It couldn't get any worse than this. I slammed on the brakes and placed my head on the steering wheel. My whole body was shaking furiously and I let out loud sobs. This pain was nothing like the one that I felt before when he left. This one would never dull or even be tolerable no matter how much time passes. I was now dead inside, nothing but an empty shell. Forever was nothing but a lie for star-crossed lovers who didn't know better.

Author's Note: sniff This is truly heartbreaking. Questions? Comments?


	13. Back to School

**Author's Note: For the past week Bella has stayed home "sick" doing nothing but keeping her head faced down on the pillow and hunting every night. She hasn't seen the school, the outside world, or any other place beside from her bedroom and the bathroom for the whole week. Henry had forgiven Elizabeth because it wasn't her fault that it happened. Elizabeth is now enrolled as a junior high school like Bella. The humans know Elizabeth as Bella's twin sister who just moved up here from New York which is where Bella supposedly moved here from. Bella hasn't formed full sentences in a full week and its concerning everyone. In the past week, Bella finally decided to start again and have a normal life as if Edward never came back. (I doubt that could ever work) You will find out that Edward is much worse. **

**Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine. **

**Back-to-School**

**A week later… **

**I pulled myself off the bed and went to get dressed for another day of school. I went into the bathroom to get ready. The eyes of the girl looking back at me from the mirror were empty and lifeless like she was missing her soul. I got in and took a quick shower, not giving my brain time to wander to other thoughts. I slipped into my clothes and made a brush levitate through my hair before going downstairs. Elizabeth waited for me downstairs already dressed and ready to go. **

"**Are you driving today?" She asked getting up from the sofa. I nodded and opened the front door and getting out. "Henry's on another business trip, he said he'll be back in two days." She closed the door behind her and we made our way to the car. I wasn't angry at Elizabeth because I knew that nothing was her fault and Henry knew that too. She was always attempting to provoke me to speak a full sentence, something I hadn't done for a week now. I merely nodded at her and got in the car slamming the door closed. "Bella, are you sure you want to go back to school today?" I nodded again but kept my eyes straight forward. I was done moping around all day. I had to move on with my life, what's done is done. **

**I started the car and stepped on the gas with the radio as the only noise in the car. I stared at the road ahead without really seeing anything. I kept repeating to myself that I was okay now and that I was stronger than this, I shouldn't let a guy be the end of my life. Today was a new day and a new me. It was a while before I realized that Elizabeth had put in a CD. One of her favorite songs came on as the third track. It was 'C'est La Vie' by BWitched. I was starting anew and I was doing it right this time so I thought why not sing along with Elizabeth. **

**_Ah Ohh Hey Hey X2  
I said, hey boy sittin in your tree  
Mummy always wants you to come for tea  
Don't be shy, straighten up your tie   
Get down from your tree house sittin in the sky  
I wanna know just what to do  
Is it very big is there room for two ?  
I got a house with windows and doors  
I'll show you mine if you show me yours_**

_Gotta let me in, hey, hey, hey  
Let the fun begin hey  
I'm the wolf today hey, hey, hey  
I'll huff I'll puff  
I'll huff I'll puff and blow you away_

Say you will say you won't  
Say you'll do what I don't  
Say you're true, say to me c'est la vie

Do you play with the girls, play with the boys ?  
Do you ever get lonely playing with your toys ?  
We can talk, we can sing  
I'll be the queen and you'll be the king  
Hey boy in your tree  
Throw down your ladder make a room for me  
I got a house with windows and doors  
I'll show you mine if you show me yours

Gotta let me in, hey, hey, hey  
Let the fun begin hey  
I'm the wolf today hey, hey, hey  
I'll huff I'll puff   
I'll huff I'll puff and blow you away

Say you will say you won't  
Say you'll do what I don't  
Say you're true, say to me c'est la vie

Say you will say you won't  
Say you'll do what I don't  
Say you're true, say to me c'est la vie 

**Elizabeth was a bit shocked that I was actually singing again at first but then she went with it and joined me. I felt a lot better after the song pulled to an end. I laughed as we pulled into the parking lot of the school and parked my car. When I turned off the engine Elizabeth grabbed my arm and I turned to look at her. **

"**I'm glad you're okay now," she whispered softly before opening her door and stepping out. **

"**I am too," I replied with a smile. **

**I pushed my own door open and stepped out of the car. Elizabeth went over to my side of the car as I closed the car door and waited for me to walk with her. We walked side by side across the parking lot ignoring the stares around us. **

"**Bella!" Alice yelled from behind me. I turned around just in time to receive the massive force of her hug. "Oh Bella, I'm so glad you're okay. I wanted to go see you but Henry didn't think that was a good idea so I didn't." Her voice was a bit muffled on my sleeve and she was talking almost too fast. **

"**Alice," I groaned struggling to free myself from her grip. "Alice, please let go of me. It's getting a bit uncomfortable." She loosened her grip and looked up to look at me. "What?" I asked wondering why she was staring at me like that. **

"**It's just that, Henry said you haven't said a full sentence all week. You seem fine to me," she muttered. I laughed and broke free of her hold. **

"**I'm great, Alice. There's no reason not to be. I'll see you later, okay?" I walked away towards the school but I could hear her muttering something behind me that I couldn't make out. **

**I took a deep breath just as the bell rang and headed to my first class. _Take it one step at a time. You have nothing to worry about yet, you don't have to see him until lunch. _That was what I thought before I felt a stone cold arm grab my wrist.**

**Author's Note: Bella has play rehearsal today so she will have to face Edward as Juliet on stage. How does that sound to you? Not a lot of things happen in this chap but it was just a transition chap. For those who find it hard to believe she can move on, she really hasn't but she's putting on a front.**


	14. Marks

**Author's Note: This story is getting out of hand even for me. I have no idea where it's going to turn next either so don't ask.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**Marks**

**The force of his grip twisted my body so that I faced him. For the briefest second, we looked into each other's eyes in silence but then he grabbed me and smacked his lips onto mine. I went weak as the electricity ran through my body and gave into his kiss. His tongue touched my lips lightly asking permission for entrance. I regained my senses then and entangled myself from him. Before I knew it, my palm had made hard contact with his cheek with an awful noise. _I just slapped him. _My hand came up to cover my mouth in shock as he looked at me with confusion, shock, and pain. Elizabeth and the rest of the Cullens were by our side in a second. because I was catching a bit too much attention from the students. **

**Elizabeth grabbed my arm and dragged me into the school and the Cullens dragged the stunned Edward in the other direction with his eyes still fixed on me. "Bella, why did you hit him?" Elizabeth asked quietly as she dragged me to our first class. I didn't know why, it just happened. "Bella, no matter what he did, he doesn't deserve that in front of everyone." When we got to the classroom door, she checked if it was unlocked and found it wasn't before turning to look at me. "Bella, are you okay?" I shook my head slowly with my eyes still on the ground. I just couldn't forget that look he gave me earlier, there was so many emotions in there that I couldn't decipher. "We have to have a talk when we get home. It's time you face your problems and listen to my side of the story." I looked up at her and shook my head furiously.**

**"No! I don't want to hear about that anymore. What happened already happened, I don't want to go backwards," I demanded. She grabbed my shoulders and shook me slightly. **

**"Don't you see Bella? You won't move forward unless you face this." I shook my head again and closed my eyes.**

**"No, I don't see. I'm okay just moving on. I don't want to hear anymore about this. Please Elizabeth," I pleaded. Her expression softened and she sighed with a nod.**

**"Fine, but you have to apologize to Edward." I wanted to say no but her expression tells me this is pure blackmail and if I don't go along then I would pay dearly. I nodded once and she smiled at me. I forced a smile back but my mind was still racing to find a reason to why I had resorted to violence. **

**The keyboarding teacher finally got there and unlocked the door and letting us in. We were at least 5 minutes early so there were no one else around, almost everyone else was in the main hallway socializing. "Welcome back, Miss Swan," the keyboarding teacher said. Elizabeth and I both turned to him automatically. I giggled as I realized that for convenience purposes, Elizabeth had adopted my last name as well. "I meant Isabella," he repeated a bit puzzled at how he were to tell us apart. I nodded quickly and took a seat at a computer next to Elizabeth. **

**This class was unbelievably dull, the students were forced to stare at the computer screen and type the mindless sentences that flash across the screen. I was getting a bit irrated at pretending to be slow and I looked over at Elizabeth. Her face was irritated as she typed the words at human speed and she looked as if she was ready to smash the computer into a million pieces. I laughed silently to myself and continued typing. When the bell rang, Elizabeth jumped out of her chair and grabbed me before running out of the classroom.**

**"That has got to be the most annoying thing in the world," she complained. I laughed and nodded in agreement. When we got to the main hallway I heard a voice behind me. I turned around to see none other than Troy running to catch up with us. Elizabeth had more courage than me and pulled on my arm as fast as she can in the other direction pretending she didn't hear him. "I can't stand his rambling. Bella, get your legs moving would you?" I straightened and walked after her. "Can you believe that he's asked me out three times a day for the past week?" She said unbelievably. **

**"Actually, I can," I replied. "Do we have every class together?"**

**"Almost. Except theater and History in your case, I have Debate those two periods. The lady in the office thought it was a good idea for a joke!" My mouth dropped open in horror. Those are the classes that I had with Edward. I had to face him alone. She didn't seem to notice and just continued to lead me to Calculus without another word. **

**I had taken Calculus one too many times and solving the problems wasn't a big deal so I spent more time on planning out what I was going to do in fifth period today. I didn't even notice when the bell rang until Elizabeth nudged me.**

**"Bella, time to go to lunch," she said with a hint of sarcasm in her voice. LUNCH! I had forgotten about lunch. I had to see him at lunch too. I wanted to bury myself in six feet of dirt and stay there in peace. Elizabeth got impatient and progress to lift me out of the chair when no one was in the classroom anymore. "Come on Bella. It won't be that bad." I groaned but knew this was inevitable. She set a good pace for me to follow to the lunch room giving me a little more time to think my actions through. _All you have to say is 'I'm sorry'. _If only it was really just that easy. **

**How could one four letter word cause me so much happiness, pain, and everything in between? Is my life really tied to him forever?**

**Elizabeth pulled the doors open for me to enter the lunch room and pushed me inside. Amazingly, we were the first ones there (except for the Cullens). It almost seemed like they planned this. Edward didn't even look up as I came in. He sat there like a statue starting at the table in front of him, his expression blank. _Is he mad at me and why do I care whether he is or not? _Elizabeth pushed me forward lightly. I looked back at her but she mouthed the words 'go on' to me. I turned around and took baby steps towards Edward. His family must've realized what I was doing because they got up and walked in the opposite direction to stand next to Elizabeth. They were holding the doors shut to the cafeteria until I was done talking to Edward. _There's no escape._ **

**As I got closer, I saw a hint of red on his pale cheek. When I was three feet from him I saw the clear shape of my hand on his cheek. I gasped. I don't think anyone has ever hit him before not to mention leave a mark like that. His eyes never left the table but his expression was changing slightly as I got closer. _How did this turn from him apologizing to me to me apologizing to him?_ The mark on his cheek was nothing compared to the one he left on my heart so why am I apologizing? _Because not only did you slap him, you did in public. His ego is scarred along with his face. And maybe even his heart._**

**Since when did I doubt my own decisions? **

**Author's Note: Next up, the apology. Oh, this will certainly be interesting.**


	15. Apologies

Author's Note: May I remind you that tomorrow is July 1st which is the day the first chapter of NEW MOON is released. Now I already read the book but I just thought that some people needed a reminder.

Disclaimer: You are just plain dense if you think I own Twilight.

I went over and took a seat directly across from him making as much noise as I could while still looking normal but he never looked up. I couldn't read his face at all because some of his bronze hair was covering it from me.

"Edward, I'm really sorry for…" He snapped his head up and his eyes burned into me with the strangest expression.

"No, Bella. It's okay, I get it. I know you're hurt and I'm really sorry for it but maybe not being together would make you happier," he stated. I was speechless now. I expected to apologize to him but instead he was apologizing to me and even telling me that it was okay that we weren't together anymore.

"Can you repeat what you just said?" I asked stupidly. He sighed placed his hands on the table.

"No one has ever slapped me before and it made me realize that the world doesn't revolve around me," he said with a smile. "I understand you're angry and I would only make it worse if I keep pushing you. Bella, no matter how long it takes for you to forgive me…even if it takes forever, I'll wait. If it makes you feel better, you can hit me or scream at me but please don't bottle it in." I felt my mouth slowly drop open. He was backing down and he welcomed my violence. Maybe I heard it wrong.

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" He nodded coyly and motioned to the others that it was okay to let the starving kids in so they could eat.

The vampires jumped out of the way of the door and moved casually back to the table as if nothing unusual happened. Edward glanced at me before getting in line to get his food. I was frozen in place, pure shock running through me. Edward Cullen just admitted that the world didn't revolve around him. Edward Cullen just told me that it was okay to hit him.

"Hey…are you Elizabeth or Bella?" Troy said sitting himself next to me with a lunch tray. I really don't need this right now.

"Bella, do you mind leaving me alone for a while?" I asked a bit rudely. He seemed a bit hurt but flounced away to his usual table with his idiot friends. Elizabeth came to sit across from me with her prop of a lunch tray but didn't disturb my silence.

"Bella, I know you don't want to hear this but after that I think you should," she started. "The day of the incident…" I winced at the memory of the day but she continued. "When I walked into his room the first thing he said when he saw me was 'Bella'. He literally screamed it. His eyes were pitch black that day, and before I knew it, he had pounced at me. And you know what happened."

"What difference does that make?" I asked. She seemed surprised by my question and hesitated before she answered.

"That proves that he was really only thinking of you and he really thought I was you," she pointed out. "Bella, he went crazy when you left." I pretended to not be affected by what she was saying. She didn't fall for it. "Bella, you can deny it all you want but you and I both know that you're lying to yourself and everyone else." I looked at her from under my lashes.

"Do you expect me to just forget everything and fall back into his arms?"

"Of course I don't. He was wrong to kiss me and to assume that you and Henry did something."

"Then what is it that you want me to do?" I was a bit confused. Did she want me to forgive him or not?

"I… have no idea. But I guess to start, you can stop ignoring him?" She suggested timidly. I considered for a moment. There was really no good reason for her to lie to me and she wasn't asking me to pretend like nothing happened and go back to him. I nodded and gave her a small smile. She grinned; satisfied that she had completed her mission. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Edward walking towards me with his tray grinning from ear to ear. I turned my eyes back to Elizabeth.

"This does not mean I forgive him. This doesn't even mean that I was friends with him. It just means that I will answer him when he talks to me and acknowledge him when he's in the room," I warned. Her smile faded a bit but she nodded in agreement. Edward stopped instantly seeming to reconsider if it was safe to be near me again. Elizabeth looked over at me nervously.

"I guess you want to be alone now. I'm going to go sit with the others." By others, I assumed she meant the Cullens. She got up and glided across the room to where they were sitting staring at the opposite wall.

Edward was still standing there staring at me curiously without a word. I sighed and motioned for him to come over. He walked gracefully but unusually slow towards me as if he was actually afraid of me. I smiled assuringly at him when he sat down.

"Do you want to yell at me some more or do you want to hit me?" he asked timidly. I laughed and shook my head.

"Neither," I answered. He raised his right eyebrow at me questioningly. "Stop being a scaredy cat, I'm not going to hit you or yell at you." His eyebrow rose even more. "I assumed you heard my little conversation with Elizabeth?" I looked up at him from my eyelashes. He didn't answer and I realized that his eyes were a bit clouded. Oops, I hadn't meant to do that. I never realized that I had the same effect on him now. I cleared my throat and it snapped him out of his daze.

"Um, yes?"

"Then you know the conditions of our agreement, correct?" He nodded with a grin on his face.

The bell rang and the cafeteria began to empty into the hallways. He looked at me like he was expecting me to say something else. I got up from my seat and joined the crowd out the door closing the subject for now.

Part of me had forgiven me and the other part was still debating. What I knew was that it was no fun toying with him if he isn't cooperating. I wondered when I became so cruel and evil.

Elizabeth and I walked to class in silence. She had the weirdest satisfying grin on her face and my brain told me I didn't want to know why.

Biology was dull as usual; the teacher's idea of teaching was lecturing us while we died from boredom. I took notes even though I hardly needed them. The hour and a half dragged itself out and I was tempted to fake sick to get out of this absolute hell. Elizabeth was banging her head lightly on the desk top but was careful not to make any noise. It was moments like this that I wished I could fall asleep like the others around me.

When the bell rang, Elizabeth and I were the first ones out the door. We really didn't mind that our speed seemed a bit peculiar now. Elizabeth waved to me as she headed to Debate and I went to Theater. This should be interesting.

Author's Note: Next up, play rehearsal! Review or I won't update! We all know that's a lie but still. I will type much faster if I feel motivated.


	16. The Game

Author's Note: I laugh every time the image of Edward in tights below a balcony saying, "She speak! Oh speak again bright angel."

Someone asked me about my note for the last chap. I meant to remind you that the first chap of NEW MOON is released…today on Ms. Meyer's website. It's early yes I know. And about me already reading NEW MOON, I already got a advanced copy and already read it more than once.

Disclaimer: I so don't own Twilight.

**The Game**

Edward was already sitting in his seat when I walked in to fifth period. The objective on the board told us that we were to rehearse the party scene today with costumes. Oh, this shall be interesting. I went over and sank into my seat next to him quietly.

"I'm glad you decided to come back to school, Miss Swan. I thought we had to recast a lead role for a while there," the teacher said as he caught sight of me. I forced a smile at him before turning to face the front again.

The bell rang and the teacher slowly made his way to the front of the room. The class shuffled around to find their costumes and going into the back rooms to change into them. I got up to find my own assuming that's what I was supposed to. When I got back up on my feet, Edward had already placed my costume onto my desk.

"Thanks," I muttered disapprovingly and he nodded. I went towards the door of the girl's dressing room.

Most of the girls were done dressing and were retouching there eight layers of make-up and furiously working a brush through their hair. I rolled my eyes and went into one of the stalls to change.

The dress for this scene was heavy and a bit uncomfortable. The fabric was rough and the sleeves smelled weird. I readjusted what I could and placed the weird looking shoes on my feet carefully and stepped out. I glanced at myself in the mirror before coming back out to the classroom. I looked reasonably okay considering this dress seemed to be made in the dark. I pulled my hair out from under the neck of the dress and returned it to its usual flow down my back.

I almost collapsed with laughter when I saw Edward. The tights clung to his muscular leg and looked awful uncomfortable. The costume looked awkward on him and he had the biggest frown on his face. He growled lowly so that only I could hear in an effort to stop my laughter. I only laughed harder as I walked to my seat with the sides of the dress held up with my hands.

"You don't look that wonderful yourself, you know?" He muttered. I glared at him stopping my laughter.

"Don't even start with me," I warned. He continued to frown but didn't comment anymore on my ridiculous dress.

"Everyone on stage!" The teacher ordered holding the door leading to the stage. I got up and made sure the dress was out of my feet before following the others out to the stage. Edward trailed after me muttering complaints and saying how historically inaccurate this is. "Action!"

I sat myself backstage bored to death at the usual reciting of lines with no inflections. We had week until show time and some people still continued to trip over their lines as if it's the first read through. Edward's lines flowed through him like he's been using the language all of his life. When it was my turn to make an appearance on stage, I got up and moved swiftly to my position.

The music picked for this scene was absolutely horrific. The movements were almost like those of a square dance. The guys that were picked for my partner had a grin on their face the whole time but Edward just looked plain angry. I didn't really have any lines before the little pilgrim moment so I was able to rerun my lines in my mind in my free moments to make sure I knew them.

Right on que, I made my way over to the spot on stage in time for Edward to grab my hand and say his lines.

_**If I profane with my unworthiest hand  
This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this:  
My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand  
To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss**_

He seemed to be amused that I was even letting him touch me without any pain. I pretended to look him over for a moment before smiling.

_**Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much,  
Which mannerly devotion shows in this;  
For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,  
And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.**_

I was having a bit of fun with my lines and batting my eyelashes at him. She seemed to be a bit lost for a moment too long and looked at me with a puzzled look. I smiled triumphantly. This was too much fun.

**_Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too_?**

Something about his tone told me he was up to something. I didn't like the look he was giving me one bit. I practically uttered my next line.

_**Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer.**_

**_O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do;  
They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair_.**

I narrowed my eyes, not sure if I should continue and find out exactly what he has planned. What choice do I have?

**_Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake. _**

I saw his eyes sparkle and he flashed his perfect teeth.

_**Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take.  
Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged.**_

He pulled me to him aggressively and met his lips to mine. I pushed my lips together just in case he was going to try anything. He wasn't planning to stick his tongue down my throat though. He moved his hand at vampire speed into the collar of my speed and unhooked my bra strap so quick I don't think anyone saw what he was doing. He grinned evilly when he pulled away from me. He balled the strap into his palm subtly and waited, satisfied, for me to say my line. I glared at him and hissed my line as gentle as I could make it sound.

_**Then have my lips the sin that they have took.**_

He was concealing his laughter but his eyes danced with satisfaction. I don't think I've ever been quite so angry at someone before.

_**Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged!  
Give me my sin again.**_

Once again he pressed his lips to mine, and before I could stop him, he unhooked the other strap. "Two can play at this game, Bella," he whispered swiftly in my ear as he pulled away. I groaned and pushed him off me subtly.

_**You kiss by the book.**_

I made sure my voice sounded alluring. Every guy including the teacher would've jumped off a cliff for me right now. It had half the effect on Edward. I winked at him before leaving the stage. I wasn't done yet. We will see who wins at this game.

Edward still had my bra straps balled up in his hands and I intended to get it back.

Author's Note: After all the very serious chaps, I decided to have a bit of fun. I hope it wasn't a total disaster for you.


	17. Phone Call

**Author's Note: So I had the weirdest dream last night. It was so sweet! I decided for it to be the ending of Loving Doubts. That will be something to look forward to.**

**Disclaimer: I certainly don't own Twilight or else I would be jumping for joy right now.**

**Phone Call**

**"Good job you two. Very realistic and perfect chemistry," the teacher commented at the end of the scene. I almost fainted with concealed laughter. He had no idea how much chemistry we had. But instead of rolling on the floor consumed by laughter, I dragged Edward by the sleeve into the classroom when everyone went to change.**

**"Give them back," I hissed. He kept the grin on his face and acted innocent.**

**"Give what back?"**

**"You know full well what!"**

**"Actually, no I don't," he said holding out his hand and shaking them in midair. _Where did he stash it?_ I heard noise and looked around to see people were starting to come out and get ready to leave. I glared at Edward for a moment before stalking away to get changed too. **

**I readjusted my bra before slipping back into my clothes. It felt...unsupported without the straps that I was used to. I was going to kill him for this. _He's already dead._ Well, he's...deader. I pulled my hair up in a pony tail with a band that I always kept around my wrist before stepping out. **

**Most people already left, eager to be anywhere but here, except for a couple of students who took a little too long to get dressed and Edward who was tucking something into his pocket. I walked out the door without a second glance at him. I made my way out to the parking lot searching my brain for a way to get pay back. **

**"Bella!" Alice yelled propelling herself at me. I braced myself for her hug and was able to keep from staggering back onto the cement. She must've realized I wasn't in the best of moods because she stopped her hug short and looked at me.**

**"What's wrong?"**

**"Ask him," I said pointing to Edward as he walked toward us from the school. Alice looked hesitant.**

**"Do I want to know?" She asked me mockingly. I shrugged and went to my car. She didn't follow me, she kept her eyes on Edward seeming to be asking him questions in her mind. I heard him laugh when I got in my car and shut the door. **

**I backed out of the parking space at impossible speeds. I saw him about ten feet from the back of the car and Alice was walking to their car shaking her head in disappoval. I put the car in reverse and stepped on the gas heading straight for him. He jumped out of the way at the last moment and seemed confused at what just happened. I stopped the car and rolled down my window.**

**"Oops, sorry I didn't see you there," I mocked. His eyebrows knit together and his mouth fell open slightly. I tilted my head back and let laughter escape before driving out of the parking lot. **

**I didn't know why, but during the car ride home I began to write a simple song in my head that had a very happy beat. I was strangely upbeat even though I was angry a moment ago. Something about today's sudden turn made me feel much lighter. **

_**Please don't walk away.**_

_**Please don't walk away.**_

_**I just wanna be.**_

_**I just wanna be.**_

_**Here right by your side.**_

_**Here right by your side.**_

_**Say you'll stay with me.**_

_**Say you'll stay with me.**_

_**Just a little while.**_

_**Just a little while.**_

_**Only you and me.**_

_**Only you and me.**_

_**Please don't walk away.**_

_**Please don't walk away.**_

_**Say you'll stay with me.**_

_**Say you'll stay with me.**_

_**Say you'll stay with me.**_

_**Stay a while.**_

_**Please stay a while.**_

_**And give me just a little time.**_

_**Boy, you know it's plain to see.**_

_**Everything you mean to me.**_

_**You could always make me smile.**_

_**No matter what I feel inside.**_

_**Boy I'm begging on my knees.**_

_**Stay a while.**_

_**Please stay a while with me.**_

**I sang it to myself happily forgetting everything that happened to me lately. I was still humming it when I got unlocked the front door of the house but then I realized that I had forgotten about Elizabeth. I turned to get back in the car and get her but there was a blur coming from the trees surrounding the house.**

**"Don't worry, I'm here," she said slowing down to a stop in the driveway.**

**"I'm really sorry," I said embarassed that I had forgotten about her. She shook her head and laughed a bit.**

**"It's okay, you've had a lot on your mind lately." She turned the doorknob and stepped into the house. She flipped the lights on and collapsed onto the couch. "So, how was your day?" **

**"Fine," I answered still humming the song to myself. I sank into the second couch and closed my eyes peacefully.**

**"What song is that?" I opened my eyes to see that she sat up and was looking at me. **

**"Oh, it's just something I made up on the way home," I answered quickly. Her expression was disbelief. I laughed and closed my eyes again and began singing the song out loud now. I heard a bit of shuffling but didn't open my eyes to look.**

**When I was done with the song, I heard a click and giggling. I fluttered my eyes open to see what was so funny. Elizabeth had a tape recorder in her hands and she popped the tape out eagerly and flounced away to find a pen to label it.**

**"What is that?" I asked suspiciously.**

**"Nothing," she replied innocently. I raised my eyebrow, not quite believing her but decided to let it go. It didn't hurt that she wanted a copy of the song. I couldn't imagine why she would but it didn't hurt.**

**I got up and went up to my room to take a shower. I took my time in the shower, letting the scalding water warm my skin. When the water suddenly ran cold, I turned it off and went out to get dressed. I got dressed quickly and went returned to my room in time to see the sun setting. The brilliant colors always amazed me and I enjoyed seeing twilight after twilight with every day that passed. I sat myself by the window and jumped when I suddenly heard my cell phone ring. I sighed and went over to get the phone from the bathroom counter. I slid it open without looking at the caller ID. I could guess at who's calling, there's not that many choices.**

**"Hello?" I said warily.**

**"Bella! Edward he's...Victoria...you have to come...now!" Alice sounded panicky and shaken. I could hardly hear her but her tone told me this was no joke. **

**"Alice, where are you!"**

**"Woods...our house...Bella...Edward...fighting...help!" I heard a clunk and the phone was suddenly dead. Oh god, what was happening? I dropped the phone and ran downstairs. My mind began to run through the possibilities of the situation. They all involved a someone getting hurt. What could possibly be happening that the Cullens couldn't handle?**

**Author's Note: I know that I'm evil for leaving it here but I've been getting a bit too few reviews lately. So get off your bottom and review if you want the next chap. **


	18. Rescue

**Author's Note: The song that was mentioned in the last chap is actually real. There's a link to the site that holds the song in my profile. Scroll down the list if you don't see it right away. The song is called Stay A While.**

**Disclaimer: I only own Elizabeth, Henry and Troy...I'm not too proud of that creation but I do nonetheless.**

**Elizabeth was on her way upstairs when I got down to the last step of the stairs. She grabbed me as I passed, her face full of concern.**

_**Rescue**_

**"Bella, what is it?" **

**"They need help," I replied, my voice a bit frantic. She nodded as if she understood everything and let go of my sleeve. I took off again with her right behind me to the car. I got in the car and slammed the door shut and backed out of the driveway with Elizabeth only halfway in. She managed to hang on and slipped in at the last minute and closed the door gently. **

**Throughout the drive, my mind kept replaying Alice's phone conversation with. One word stuck with me, _Victoria_. Alice's voice was panicked and desperate, she really needed help and expected me to be there. I don't know what I'd do if one of them got hurt. I pushed down harder on the gas and the car purred slightly before speeding up. I refused to think of what would happen if I was too late or if I couldn't find them. I reassured myself over and over that I would make it and that everything would be okay. Elizabeth must've sensed my inner struggle because she stayed quiet, not wanting to make it worse for me. **

**When we finally reached the house, I didn't even take the time to pull into the driveway. I slammed on the brakes and hopped out of the car when I heard the tires skid to a stop. I ran into the woods surrounding the house, desperately searching for a sign of them. Elizabeth ran after me, her eyes scanning the surroundings too. With every moment that passes, my mind ran wild with horrible scenarios to the situation. Suddenly, a familiar growl erupted from the left of us. I halted in my tracks and so did Elizabeth. She looked at me to make sure that I heard it too. I nodded quickly before heading in the direction of the sound. I ran until I saw a couple of trees that had been knocked over and broken like something hit it really hard causing it to snap into two. Elizabeth looked over at me in horror, seeming to realize what I just did too. _There had been a fight here._ **

**I heard another growl, this one vicious and unfamiliar to my memory a little deeper onto our right. I dashed in its direction runnning faster than I ever thought that I was capable of. I came to a rough clearing, the surrounding trees knocked over and bruised terribly to create it. Emmett and Jasper were lying on the ground, unconscious. Alice and Rosalie were lying face down near a tree. Alice had her cell phone lying beside her broken into three pieces. My eyes darted around to search for Edward but I couldn't find him. Elizabeth was trying to wake Alice or any of them but they layed lifeless on the ground as if they were truly _dead_. I let out a dry sob but refused to accept my conclusion of why they weren't responding. **

**I walked over to Emmett wanting to try to get him up myself but I felt a slight breeze. I looked up just in time to see Edward flying through the air and hitting a tree trunk before hitting the ground.**

**"Edward!" I screamed. I saw a flash of red heading towards his lifeless body and something heading for me. The blur hit me and knocked me backwards onto the grass. I didn't have time to even get a good look at what hit me before it started to punch me.**

**I flipped the figure off me and kicked it into a group of trees. Elizabeth rushed over to me to check if I was okay.**

**"Bella, I'll deal with him. You go help Edward!" Her tone was urgent and angry. I nodded and got on my feet and rushed in the direction I saw Edward and Victoria.**

**I saw her hunched over him hitting him over and over again. He looked exhausted and could hardly fight back but there was also something about his movements. He looked slower and had less force than the usual Edward. Her last punch knocked him out and she began to tear him apart. **

**I sped up and crouched down before pouncing on her sending her flying 10 feet back. I was quicker than her and managed to dodge some of the punches she threw but the ones that hit me were of extreme force. One of them knocked me off her and in a second she was standing over me and kicking my sides. I flipped over and caught sight of a tree and ordered it to unroot itself and collide with her. The tree ripped itself out of the ground and flew at Victoria at lightning speed and hit her like a bat hitting a baseball. She flew above the trees and deeper into the woods. I got up dropping the tree from my mind and ran in her direction. **

**I found her caught in a tree, disoriented and hurt badly. I climbed up and dragged her down. I slapped her a dozen times before she was knocked out cold and began tearing her apart into the tiniest pieces I can manage. I was only halfway done when I heard a loud crack and a growl. This wasn't Elizabeth's growl. I panicked and headed back to where I left her and the other vampire.**

**Elizabeth was lying on the grass knocked out while the other vampire stood over her. He had untidy black hair and black hair. He doesn't possess the beauty that I was often accustomed to when it came to vampires. He was disgusting and ugly with horrible posture. He growled at me when I interrupted whatever he was about to do to her.**

**"She was no match for me. None of them were. It was only a matter of time before my voice sang them into a sleep. And as soon as I'm done, they won't ever wake up," he laughed. He was the one that did this to them. Edward was almost helpless because of him. My family was now unconscious because of him. **

**I didn't even realize that he had already began to sing. When he spoke, his voice was squeaky and sounded like he had a sore throat but now it sounded even and beautiful as if it came out of angel. I liked it but I didn't feel sleepy at all. I flashed my teeth at him and jumped on him. He seemed surprised at the force I was able to put forth. I didn't give him the time to ask any question. I punched him as hard and as fast as I could without stopping and didn't even stop when he was clearly knocked out. **

_**Stop. You have to tear him to shreds and burn both of their bodies.**_

**I stopped at my mind's reminder. I quickly tore his body to pieces, got up, and pulled out my last piece of energy to run back to the house and search for matches or a lighter. I went throught the house and found an ancient lighter in one of the kitchen cupboards and almost jumped for joy. I refrained from doing just that and made my way back to the woods and set both of Victoria's and the her friend's bodies on fire and watched it burn to a handful of ashes.**

**I put out the fire with the extinguisher from the house a while later and collapsed on the floor in exhaustion and stress. I remembered murmuring a faint, "Edward" before letting myself slip into darkness and landing on the soft grass. I was happy that I was able to save my family but I was didn't have the strength to hunt now and the thirst would eventually kill me. Would someone be able to rescue me then?**

**Author's Note: Review! Oh and in case you were wondering, this is already the start of the conclusion for LOVING DOUBTS.**


	19. Unconscious

**Author's Note: I apologize the delay with my updates lately. I am working and my mom just bought a business so I am now busy helping both her and her boyfriend cause he can't see so well anymore. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**Unconscious**

**I was slipping in and out of consciousness. The few moments that I was able to open my eyes, everything seemed bright red like blood. The thirst was driving me mad but I couldn't gather enough strength to even keep my eyes open. I didn't know whether you could starve a vampire to death but I didn't want to wait and find out. At one point, I felt like I was suddenly floating in space and gravity was no longer in effect. Again, I was suddenly able to open my eyes. The sky seemed to be drenched in blood. I heard a voice calling me but it seemed so far away and I couldn't find my way to it. **

**Someone appeared above me, blocking the crimson sky from view. He had a gentle voice and his face looked concerned. I seemed to know him but couldn't remember how or who he was. He examined me as my eyes grew heavy and gave in to the darkness once again. I felt my body being lifted and carried by someone as if I was made of glass. I heard whispers but couldn't comprehend the words behind them. Aside from the thirst and the exhaustion, I was worried about something. What was it?**

**I felt myself being dropped onto something soft and warm. Something swept my hair out of my face lightly and mentioned my name. I drifted in space again. Once, I thought I saw a dim light in the distance and something was calling me towards it. Part of me wanted to but the other part told me I couldn't go yet. I couldn't leave them behind. But who is them?**

**I drifted back into consciousness and opened my eyes warily in time to see a small pixie-like girl sitting next to me. She had a bowl in her hand and was moving it slowly towards me. I closed my eyes to blink and found that they refused to open again. I had no strength to left to fight my eyelids but I continued to wonder who the girl was and what was that she was holding. **

**Someone forced my jaw open and poured something into my mouth. The liquid was warm and satifying. It brought an ounce of strength back to my body so I could open my eyes for the briefest second. I saw the girl again. She switched the bowl for another on the bedside table next to her and brought it towards me again. I was overjoyed that she was going to give me more of the life-giving fluid and wanted to thank her but I still didn't have the energy to.**

**She opened my jaw again and poured it in much quicker this time. The warm liquid burned in my mouth and left me a bit more energized. The girl repeated this process over and over again for almost 200 times. She poured the fluid in quicker and quicker everytime and I was slowly able to feel my muscles again and keep myself from drifting off. When she was done, she sighed in relief and left my side. **

**I fluttered my eyelids open and looked at her. She was cleaning up the bowls that were scattered everywhere. My mind suddenly clicked into place and told me her name was Alice. I used my arm as a lever and pulled myself up off the bed.**

**"Alice," I croaked. She flicked around and smile brightly when she saw me.**

**"Bella! You're okay! Thank goodness. You got us so worried. You looked like you had an inch of life left when we found you," she said happily. I smiled for only a brief second.**

**"Edward! Is Edward okay?" Her smile fell and she took her eyes from mine and stared at the blanket. I panicked, grabbed her shoulders, and shook her hard. "Alice, tell me what's going on!" She shook her head and turned her face onto me.**

**"Just rest, Bella. Everything is fine," she reassured. Why isn't she telling me? What's going on?**

**"Alice, tell me. I'm fine. I just collapsed because I was thirsty but I'm fine now," I insisted. She sighed in defeat and nodded.**

**"He hasn't regained consciousness. We don't know why. Everyone woke up and felt perfectly fine but he never did," she said lowly. My eyes grew wide and my whole body started to shake uncontrollably. **

**"Where is he now?" I muttered.**

**"He's in the living room." **

**I got up swiftly and the blanket fell on the floor. I went downstair and into the living room. Edward laid on the couch looking like he was asleep, but he wasn't, vampires can't sleep. He was unconscious and even the steady rise and fall of his chest indicating that he was breathing was gone too. He wasn't dead and I could tell. I walked over and sat myself on the floor next to the couch. I swept his untidy hair back lightly and laid my head on his chest.**

**"Edward, can you hear me? If you can, you have to get better," I whispered. Esme appeared by my side and touched my shoulder in a motherly way.**

**"Bella, Carlisle wants to see you in his office," she said gently. I got up and she hugged me. "Everything will be fine, dear." I nodded and could only hope she was right.**

**I made my way upstairs thinking what I wouldn't give to have him up and...just be himself again. I would never take him for granted again. I would stop being so stubborn and enjoy being in his arms again. This was all my fault. Victoria wanted to avenge James's death and James is dead because of me. I was the cause of everything. Ever since I entered their lives, I've caused them nothing but conflict and hurt.**

**I opened the door to Carlisle's office and took a seat on the other side of his giant desk. He smiled when I entered and looked up from the papers he was reading. I wanted to force a smile back at him but found that I couldn't manage that right now.**

**"Are you feeling alright, Bella?" He asked concerned. I nodded.**

**"Yes, I'm fine. I felt okay as soon as I was satiated again." He nodded knowingly. He looked wary and tired as if he's been worrying or thinking too much lately.**

**"Bella, I will just tell you what is going on because I know you hate it when we keep things from you," he began. "Edward's wounds have healed completely. As far as I can tell, there is nothing wrong with him." I stood and banged my hands on the desk. I felt it crack underneath the force but didn't bother to look down.**

**"Then why is he still unconscious?" Carlisle shook his head.**

**"I truly don't know," he flicked his golded eyes and met mine in concern. "But I do have a theory." My mind refocused and I stared at him waiting for an answer. "Everyone of us woke up without a problem. Of course, we weren't fighting for as long and as hard as Edward was able to. Maybe part of it was his injuries and his exhaustion but both of those are now taken cared of." I opened my mouth to protest but he held up a hand to stop me and continued. "While we were unconscious, we felt like we were in the middle of nowhere and floating carelessly towards nowhere. Alice was the first one to get up and she woke us. Her voice was the reason why we fought against the current and woke up, but she said that she fought hard because she was worried about you." I was getting a bit impatient but didn't think it was a good idea to interrupt him. "Edward may not be fighting to get back. If he doesn't, he may continue to to float until who knows how long." I shook my head in disagreement. **

**"What reason does he have for not wanting to wake up?"**

**"You, Bella. He is afraid that if he wakes, you will leave again. He would rather be stuck in the middle of life and death, reality and fantasy than watch you leave," he concluded. This was truly all my fault, I am the reason why Edward is just lying there.**

**Author's Note: Question? Comments? **


	20. Angel

Author's Note: Thank you for all the reviews! Loving Doubts exceeded Decade in reviews and I'm jumping for joy.

Disclaimer: No matter how much I wish I did, I don't own Twilight.

I made my way back to Edward and planted myself by his side again. His angelic face hasn't changed a tiny bit but somehow he seemed so gone and withered. I wondered if he could hear me if I spoke to him.

"Edward, please get up." I laid my head on his stone chest and closed my eyes.

_A week later..._

I forced his mouth open, poured in the last of the blood, and hit his chest so he could swallow it. Nothing changed since last week. He still laid there motionless as if he was in a coma. I rarely ever left his side. I only left to do necessary things such as shower and hunt. Even then, I can't stop thinking of him.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, there's a tiny voice that told me there is a possibility that he may never wake up but I refused to accept that. He would be fine. Edward was so full of life even as a vampire and seeing him just so still killed me inside. With each day that passes, a part of me dies a little more. I wish I could hear his voice again, listen to him play the piano, even hum my lullaby. I missed his penetrating eyes and his breath-taking crooked smile.

I opened his mouth to check if he swallowed it all before getting up to put the bowl away. Esme saw me and smiled at me but it never touched her eyes. She was the only one at home with me, the others went to school and Carlisle went to the hospital. Henry was on another trip and would be back tomorrow.

I felt a pang of jealousy towards Elizabeth. She was sure that her love would be back and once again be in his arms. I was sure a week ago, but my hopes are dying with each day that goes by.

I rinsed the bowl and placed it back into the cupboard. I rushed back to Edward with the tiniest hope that he would be sitting up when I got there and everything would be just fine. I don't know why I continued to give myself hope and then see it getting crushed a second later.

Edward was still as stone when I got back and in the exact place that I had left him. _Why does he continue to just lay there as if there is no one here waiting for him to get up?_

I remembered that Carlisle had warned me that the longer he stayed in this sleep, the harder it was to wake up. Everyday it got harder for him to swallow the blood I poured into his mouth. Once a day, he would let out a few breaths but since yesterday he hasn't let out one. I hated feeling so helpless. I wanted to do something to help him but I didn't know what.

I sat down on the floor next to him and kissed his cheek lightly. When I pulled away he suddenly gasped loudly and sounded like he was having an asthma attack. His eyes never opened but he writhed and twisted violently. I sprung up and grabbed both of his arms and pinned him down with all my might.

"Esme! Call Carlisle!" I yelled franticly. Esme ran to the phone and dialed the number at lightning speed. What was happening to him?

He was much stronger than me and his struggling was hard to control. I fought to make him stay still through his screaming and growling. I was running out of strength and endurance and couldn't hold him much longer.

"Esme!" I pleaded. She was by my side in a second and helped my hold him.

He continued to fight for a couple minutes until he settled once again in his lifeless state. I sighed and let go of his arms collapsing onto the floor. Esme sank down next to me and breathed loudly. I stared at his still figure and wondered what caused him to react so violently. Carlisle busted into the house and ran into the room.

"What happened?" He asked concerned.

"He suddenly started to twist and turn like he was having some sort of nightmare. What is happening to him?" I sobbed.

Carlisle went over to Edward and opened his eyelids with his fingers. He continued to examine him for another moment before turning back to me.

"Bella, I think he was just having a bad fantasy. I think his time is running out," he sighed.

"What do you mean is time is running out?" I stammered.

"During this whole time, he was having wonderful dreams but now they are slowly turning. If he's stays in there much longer, he'll probably get trapped in his own nightmares. We can't help him if he doesn't want to help himself," he informed. I shook my head in disbelief. "He may not have a lot of time left. I'll leave you two alone," he said wheeling Esme out of the room and outside.

My whole body had started to shake. I returned to his side and dug my face into his chest in uncontrollable sobs.

"Edward, can you hear me? Speak to me. You can't keep doing this to yourself and to your family! You have to get up."

He laid motionless as if I said nothing that really mattered. His chest suddenly began to move again and his breathing became gasps. _He was doing it again. _I instinctively grabbed his arms and pinned him to the couch.

"Edward! Stop doing this," I pleaded. "Please, open your eyes and look at me! You can't just leave me again. You promised me you wouldn't ever hurt me. Wake up. Is this what you call loving me? Stop being a coward and get up." He continued to twist in my grip and growling furiously at me but I swore I heard him say my name in the middle of those growls. This thought encouraged me and let me know that I may be the only one who could snap him out of this stupor.

"Edward, listen to me! If you love me you won't leave me again. Wake up! You promised you wouldn't cause me anymore pain but you are by doing this to yourself. I love you and I want you to get up. How am I supposed to forgive you if you lay here for the rest of your life. Edward, please get up!" He stopped moving instantly but never opened his eyes. I sobbed and placed my head on his chest and let go of his arms.

I began to pull my arms away to sweep my hair out of my face but something held it in place. I snapped my head up to look at my arm and gasped. A muscular pale hand held mine and gripped it hard but never hurting me.

"What did you say?" he asked almost inaudible.

"Edward, please get up?" I answered avoiding his eyes and trying to pull my arm away. He wouldn't have that, he refused to let me move an inch.

"Before that."

"You can't leave me again?" He growled in frustration and moved his free hand to push my chin up.

"I thought you said you loved me and that you would forgive me if I woke up." His eyes burned into mine. I almost forgot how beautiful they were.

"You had me scared to death," I accused attempting to change the subject. He sat up suddenly and pulled me to him crushing our bodies together.

"You truly are an angel. Without you, I don't think I could face this world again," he whispered into my shoulder.

"I'm no angel," I replied. I was the cause of his pain and the cause of every problem lately, how could I be his angel if I brought him nothing but sadness?

Author's Note: Review! We are one chapter closer to the end.


	21. Momentary Bliss

**Author's Note: The end of Loving Doubts is near, as you all probably already know. I do have another idea but I could go for another sequel or just start again with a whole different fic. If I write a sequel, it would save me the whole character analysis process but I could go either way. What you think?**

**Disclaimer: Let's see, I don't own the Cullens and Ms. Swan but I do own Henry, Elizabeth, and Troy.**

**Momentary Bliss**

**Edward continued to hold me to him like I was the only thing keeping him alive until the door popped open and Alice raced in like she always did when she got home. Her face lit and she almost looked like Christmas morning when she saw us. She flew over and hugged Edward and laughed.**

**"Oh, I'm so glad you're okay. We were all so worried about you," she let go and suddenly serious. "Don't you ever do that to us again!"**

**I laughed at her warning and Esme and Carlisle entered followed by the others. They all looked shocked and happy at the same time. Carlisle and Esme looked confused and I guessed that they were wondering when he got up since they only left for about 15 minutes. Esme was the first to recover into her usual motherly smile and her eyes lit with joy just like Alice's.**

**"What did we miss exactly?" Carlisle asked. **

**"Just Bella saving my life is all," Edward joked pulling me to him. _He wouldn't need saving if it wasn't for me._ I was truly happy to be in his arms again but I couldn't shake the fact that this was my fault. **

**"So you're alright?" Emmett confirmed. Edward nodded and chuckled.**

**"Obviously, if I am able to do this," he pecked my cheek quickly and everyone laughed. I would've blushed scarlet if I still could. **

**"I believe these two needs a little alone time before you ambush them with questions," Esme suggested shooing the others away but Edward shook his head at her.**

**"No, they can stay here. I'll take Bella up to our room," he replied sweeping me into his arms before I could protest and ran upstairs.**

**He kicked the door closed behind him and dropped me onto the bed. I could tell that he was about to pounce on top of me so I attempted to roll away. He was much quicker and grabbed my wrists and pinned me down on my back.**

**"Why are you attempting to run away from me?" He whispered, the air from his mouth tickling my ear. I giggled and turned to face him.**

**"Because I hate to be trapped," I replied. He readjusted himself so that he was laying next to me with is arms around my waist and my back to his chest.**

**"I wish there was some way that I could keep you here with me forever, but you are a free bird and keeping you here will not be a possibility," he said gloomily. Is there someway that he could know what I'm thinking suddenly? "Bella, during the time that I was unconscious, I could hear and feel what is going on but I couldn't speak. I felt myself free and happy. Suddenly, my dreams provided me a safe haven where nothing can go wrong. I was in my own heaven and had no reason to return to this cruel world, because here, you would be lost to me. I was happy to fool myself into thinking that you would stay by my side and let me stay by yours. I could hear you voice and feel your touch, but I didn't want to face the fact that if I woke, you would once again leave me. Up until lately, my fantasy was perfect but they suddenly became horrific. Everything started to go wrong before my eyes and I could no longer help what was happening. Yet, I didn't want to wake because as long as I didn't you would stay and comfort me everyday. You would continue to sing to me and continue to delight me with your touch..." I turned in his arms and placed my finger to his lips.**

**"That's enough. I don't need to know anymore," I whispered. He untangled his arm from my waist and grabbed my finger and kissed it tenderly. He met his lips to mine and I returned his passion.**

**For now, I didn't need to think of what tomorrow will bring. I didn't have to think about of how I need to stop endangering him and his family. I could stop the voice that told me every moment I spent with him could be the cause of his future pain. I could stop all that for now and just enjoy his company and his love. I was happy to have him back, even if it's just for the briefest moment.**

**His tongue tapped my lips gently asking me for permission to enter. I kept them shut testing to see how long he can wait. He tapped again but this time a bit harder and longer. I refrained my laughter and continued to seal the entrance shut. I felt the vibration of his throat and knew that he was growling in frustration. I knew he respected me too much to force his way in but he was also too determined to get in so I was holding him with nowhere to go. I breathed in a bit of air and opened my lips a tiny bit before blowing the air into his mouth. **

**He tensed and pulled me even closer to him. He decided to try again and touched his tongue onto my lips for the briefest moment before pulling back and waited for my response. I peeked my eyes open and saw that his were open too. He looked at me curiously. I winked at him and opened the entrance to accept him in. I let go of every thought and let his love guide me above the clouds.**

**Author's Note: I know this is shorter than my usual short but hey this was sort of a transition chapter. But you must review or I will not update for a looong time. If you haven't figured it out yet, Bella is planning something.**


	22. Too Little Too Late

**Author's Note: So far only one person has gave me their opinion on whether I should write a sequel to this story or go for a whole new fanfic. I'd love it if I get a few more feedback concerning this. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight so I don't want to meet any lawyer concerning this subject. **

**Too Little Too Late**

**I don't know how long we've been busy but the sky was getting dark and the light coming through the window was slowly decreasing. I wanted to continue to lie in his arms and pretend that the world only involved the two of us and didn't go beyond this room, but I couldn't. **

"**Edward," I muttered. **

"**Hmm?" **

"**Go shower," I commanded. **

"**Why?" He whined. **

"**Because you haven't done so in a week!" I insisted jumping out of his arms and onto my feet. He got to his feet as well and threw me over his shoulder. **

"**Fine, but you're coming with me,'' he said walking towards the bathroom. I kicked and screamed for him to put me down but he continued as if I was talking to myself. **

"**ALICE!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. The door flew open so quick it fell off its hinges and fell flat on the floor. **

"**What? What's wrong?" She asked nervously but then she saw me on Edward's shoulder with my head swinging from side to side. She laughed and proceeded to us. **

"**Don't even think about it Alice," Edward warned. She tugged me by the arm off of him and he tried to hold me back by the arms. They each pulled as hard as they could and I felt like I was being stretched too thin. **

"**Stop playing tug-o-war with my body!" They were a bit surprised by my sudden outbursts so they both dropped me. I landed with a loud thump and let out a shriek. They stared at me for a moment before the laughing began again. I rolled my eyes and got back on my feet. I waited for their laughter to cease before I pushed Edward towards the bathroom. **

"**Go shower," I commanded. He groaned but went in and clicked the door shut. I turned to Alice and nodded to tell her it was okay to go now. She turned and left still giggling slightly. **

**I heard the water turn on and looked towards the door. I sighed and took a deep breath. Goodbye Edward. I made sure my keys were in my pocket before going downstairs. I made my way to the front door without incident but then Esme appeared. **

"**Where are you going dear?" **

"**My house to pick up some things. I'll be back in a few, okay?" I quickly lied. It was hard to look Esme in the eyes and lie to her. I hadn't planned to be back. She nodded and smiled and went back into the kitchen. I sighed silently and opened the door and stepped out. **

**I glanced at the beautiful house on last time before getting in my car and driving away. I pushed the car to 200 mph and turned the music up loud to drown out my thoughts. This was the right thing to do no matter how much it hurt. I've caused them all enough pain, especially Edward. Their lives were uneventful and happy without me in it, I had to leave. **

**I pulled into the driveway, jumped out, and ran towards the house hoping that Elizabeth wasn't there. She was rarely ever home. She may be in love with Henry but it doesn't stop her fun. She could get her way into any night club she wanted by just winking at the guy at the door. Henry wasn't the jealous type and he understood her more than anyone so they had a quiet agreement. As long as she doesn't overdo it and he doesn't work all the time, they are fine and dandy. **

**I noticed her car wasn't in it's usual spot and knew that she wasn't home. I ran upstairs to my room and threw clothes into a suitcase as fast as I could while dialing the number for the airport's elite group. **

"_**Hello, this is the International Airport may I help you?" **_

"**I need a private jet please," I said calmly. **

"**_I would love to help you with that madam."_ I knew what he wanted me to say. **

"**Code 158596," I cut in. **

"**_Alright, one second while I pull up the status for your jet."_ **

"**I need it ready in 30 minutes no later. I need it to have enough fuel to get to the private islands," I stated closing my suitcase. **

"_**That will be no problem. May I confirm who I am talking to?" **_

"**Isabella Swan." **

"**_Alright, your plane will be ready in 15 minutes at gate 1. Will you be the only passenger?"_ **

"**Yes." I grabbed the suitcase and began pulling it downstairs and outside. I had to hurry because I didn't have much time before Edward figures out I didn't just go to my house to pick some things up. **

**I threw the bag into the backseat and got in roaring the engine to life. As I drove, I fought with my thoughts so that it wouldn't wander to what my life would be like without Edward again. I couldn't let that get in the way of what I had to do. **

**In exactly fifteen minutes, I arrived at the tiny airport. I rarely used the private jet to travel but this was the only way he couldn't track me and the only way that I could get in the time I had. Even Henry didn't know about my major account with this airport and my purchase of a tiny island in the Atlantic Ocean a few years back. I reserved it for times when I needed some sun and beach and a getaway from reality. **

**The only parking space I could find was the last one at the farthest end of the parking lot with a thin strip of pavement next to it leading into the side doors of the airport. I pulled the car into the spot and got out. I opened the door to the backseat and dragged my luggage out of the car and onto the pavement and walked towards the airport.**

**When I got to the door my feet halted to a stop. My heart and my brain had different opinions on what I should be doing and neither wanted to compromise. I took a deep breath and pushed myself forward. **

_**Couldn't you have given him and yourself a chance to say goodbye?**_

**It was too late for all that now. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be. Even after 10 years we still couldn't make it work. We had love but fate isn't on our side. Maybe it was too little too late. The Lamb wasn't meant to be with the Lion.**

**Author's Note: You wonder why she just has to kill her own happiness but that's the way people are. Review!**


	23. Stay A While

**Author's Note: Thank you for all the feedback, I have decided to write a whole new fanfic! But of course, I still have to apply a great ending for this one first.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**Stay A While**

**When I entered the airport, everything seemed normal except there was not a soul around. A light song was playing on the intercom and there were roses on every surface possible except for the floor. Everything looked as if it was working fine but everyone seemed to have disappeared from this place. The scent of roses filled the room and my nose. I stood near the door not sure what to think. I placed my arm on the handle of my luggage and dragged it forward. The only noise aside from the music was my boots clicking on the tiled floor. **

**I heard a distinct flap of wings and halted to a stop in the center of the room. Something white was flying towards me from above but I couldn't tell where it was coming from. It perched itself on the floor in front of me and dropped a single piece of paper before taking off again, this time landing on the information desk to my right. I bent down and picked up the piece of paper and unfolded it. Before I read it I glanced at the dove that just dropped the letter. It was just standing there looking at me with its tiny eyes.**

_**Isabella,**_

_**Someone once said that 'what you didn't have to fight for wasn't worth winning'. I believe that you are the worthiest thing in the world so did you think that I would let you get on the plane without a word? The question is, whether you think we are worth fighting for.**_

**There was no name to tell me who it from but I knew due to the unmistakable handwriting and the words written. I looked up in time so see another dove swoop down to me. This time, I held my hand out for it to land on and grabbed the paper from its beak. As soon as I had the next letter in my hand, it flew away to join the first one.**

_**I will not stop you if you wished to go. Remember that I said you were a free bird with the world at your feet? No one can keep you if you wished to leave but I do ask of you one thing. I ask you to allow me to try to hold your feet and tell you how I feel before you do leave.**_

**I looked up and swung around in a full circle, hoping to find where he was. There was not a glimpse of his angelic being. I heard more wing flapping and swung around in that direction. This bird didn't swoop down, it simply dropped the letter for me to catch and flew off to the others.**

_**Bella you are the angel of light in my world of complete darkness. Before you, I believed I had everything that life could possibly need. When I found you, I had the strangest feelings in all of my years. I was suddenly happy and there was a meaning to this life. I began to even look forward to everyday. After you, I will be nothing but an empty shell. I will merely exist but my soul and heart will not be where my body is.**_

**I didn't know what to think anymore. My heart was clearly winning this fight. If he had appeared, I didn't know if I could ever leave again. I waited for another letter but there was no sound for a very long minute. Then there was a click on the intercom and the music stopped abruptly and my angel's voice came on.**

**"Bella, if you still insist on leaving I will not get in your way. Just know that I love you and will always await your return. I will never get in your way of the life you are after. I will be here when you need me and when you need comforting. You can always return if you do not find what you are looking for in life." There was a long pause before he continued. "I don't understand why we cannot be. I don't understand what goes on in that mind of yours and you wouldn't tell me so I cannot help reassure you of what you doubt. Bella, maybe the biggest problem in our relationship is honesty. We both insist on keeping things inside and blaming ourselves for everything that occurs in our lives. I have learned my lesson, Bella. Now, you are making the same mistake that I did ten years ago. All I ask is for once in your life; let your heart guide you instead of your brain. I love you angel and I'll be waiting for your answer." The click sounded again and I knew he had gotten off. The music began again but this time it was familiar.**

**He sounded like a psychologist but everything he said was right. I was making the same choice he did when he left. 'I'm leaving you for your own good.' I hated him for that because he didn't let me have a say in the matter and instead of making it better for me, it devastated me for ten years. **

**I had never talked to him about what I was feeling and it grew into many misunderstandings and horrible events. I have ignored the instincts of my heart and listened to only my brain was saying. **

**For a while, I couldn't remember where I heard this song before because there were no words, just piano notes. Then, I heard MY voice singing the words. **

_**Please don't walk away,**_

_**Please don't walk away.**_

_**I just wanna be,**_

_**I just wanna be.**_

_**Here right by your side,**_

_**Here right by your side.**_

_**Say you'll stay with me,**_

_**Say you'll stay with me.**_

**This was the song I wrote the day of the fight with Victoria but how did he get this? It suddenly dawned on me; Elizabeth had gotten it on tape that day. She had made copies and added some instrumental background and left it in my room. It was hidden under some clothes and must've fallen out when I was packing to leave. **

**Edward suddenly appeared out of nowhere and stood in front of me about ten feet away. He sang along with the song loud enough for me to hear, keeping his eyes on me. He twisted the words a bit so that it fits his view and not mine.**

_**Stay a while please stay a while**_

**_And give me just a little time.  
Girl you know it's plain to see _**

**_Everything you mean to me.  
You could always make me smile_**

**_No matter what I feel inside.  
Girl I'm begging on my knees_**

**_Stay a while please stay awhile with me._**

**I felt a smile on my lips as I watched him sing to me. He was great at it and I could tell that he was a bit embarrassed but still did it because of me. I let go of the handle for my luggage and took off towards him. My boots made a racket on the floor but I didn't care. He stopped singing and held out his arms to receive me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and dug my face into his right shoulder. He snaked his arms around my waist and held me to him.**

"**I'll take that as a yes," he whispered in my hair. I nodded and gripped him harder. "Will this time be forever or just a little while?" he murmured in my ear.**

"**Forever," I stated and turned my head to meet his lips to mine. I don't think that I could ever leave without him knowing and doing something like this to stop me, so why bother? He was all the reassurance that I needed and I saw no world beyond him. **

**Author's Note: Next stop, the wedding, which happens to be the last chapter of Loving Doubts. Review! **


	24. Preparations

**Author's Note: This is last chappie people. Thank you for all of your support! For those who feel so very attached to me, add me to your author alert list and you shall know when I post my newest story. For those who already did it, sit back and wait patiently. For those who want a sequel, sorry but I have to say no to that. I have overwritten this story and I think that's enough drama for now. Once again, I must put the sequel to New Life on hold. Will I ever write it? Probably not but who knows? Love you all! Many thanks to my very frequent reviewers who have stayed with me through all three stories, Seraphyn and kremmy. If I don't mention you and you do fit the criteria, I'm terribly sorry, I am naming from the top of my head here. Enough with my yapping, time for the chapter!**

**Disclaimer: Roses are red.**

**Violets are blue.**

**I don't own Twilight.**

**So please don't sue.**

_**Preparations**_

**Today is the day! Rosalie and Alice had separated me and Edward since early this morning and refused to let him see me. She said it was bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding but I thought it was just silly superstition. Rosalie disappeared into her closet while Alice dragged me into the bathroom and sat me down in a chair in front of the sink.**

**"Bend your head in the sink," I did what she said hesitantly wondering what she was going to do. She turned on the water full blast and began to rub my hair in between her palms like she was washing clothes by hand. I closed my eyes and calmed my nerves while she poured shampoo on my head and started to lather my long hair.**

**Strangely, I wasn't a tad bit nervous about being his wife. I was nervous about reading my vows and about the surprise I had planned. Alice finished and turned off the water. She quickly grabbed a towel and worked it through my hair thoroughly and slowly. When she was done, I flipped my head up and the motion caused my hair to fly backwards and onto my back again. Rosalie came back with the dresses and placed them on her bed before joining us in the bathroom.**

**"Where is Elizabeth?" I asked curiously.**

**"She's greeting the guests and making sure everything is exactly like they should be," Rosalie replied grabbing a hair dryer and joined Alice in blowing hot air at my head. "She'll be here in a few minutes to get ready herself."**

**They tugged and ruffled my hair until it was completely dry and worked a brush through it quickly to make sure there was no tangles in it. I can't remember ever getting one single tangle in my hair ever since the change so I didn't see why they had to check. Alice put on some cream like substance in my hair and Rosalie began to curl my hair with the curling iron. She made small bouncy curls throughout my hair. Finally, Alice pulled several curls near the front back and pinned them down. She was careful to leave one curl on each side of my face and Rosalie quickly straightened it so that it cupped my face. When she was done, Alice stepped back and clapped in approval of her job before Rosalie stepped out of the mirror's way and let me see their progress. **

**I gasped. It was perfect. Rosalie placed a hand mirror behind me and I was able to see my hair from behind. Alice held the hair in with invisible pins and the only thing showing was the red and white flowers at the top of the pins themselves. I nodded slightly in approval and the curls bounced with the motion. Alice and Rosalie began to work on the makeup.**

**They lined the rim of my eyelids with a bit of eyeliner to bring out my eyes and applied a light pink to the rest of the eyelid. A bit of blush was applied to my cheeks to give me the slightest hint of my human blush. A bit too much of mascara was applied but Alice said it was all necessary. I wore bright red lipstick and it ignited my pale skin. Alice and Rosalie knew that I wanted a simple look so that was basically it. Once again, I was stunned by what they were able to do and felt excited for Edward to see me. Elizabeth walked in and dropped the shoes she was carrying.**

**"Bella, you are absolutely beautiful!" We all laughed at this comment. Rosalie was the first to stop and she straightened.**

**"Alright, time to change. You are getting married today after all and I don't think Edward would be too happy if we are doing this any later than we already are," she announced and pulled me to my feet. Alice disappeared to get the dress and Elizabeth and Rosalie helped me out of my clothes to make it even faster than it already is. When Alice returned, she handed Elizabeth a CORSET! She must've seen the look on my face because she laughed. **

**"Don't worry Bella, it's not like you need to breath," she joked and helped the others put it on me. I gulped but let them squeeze me into the horrific thing. Alice pulled on the strings as hard as she could and the thing clung to me squeezing the air out of my lungs for a moment. "All good?"**

**"Am I supposed to be able to breath?" I gasped.**

**"No," Alice replied insignificantly.**

**"Okay, then it's good." I thought that was bad but Rosalie suddenly handed me a matching THONG! I opened my mouth to protest but Rosalie threw me a look that made me close my mouth again. I sighed and reminded myself of why I'm doing this and slipped it on quickly wanting to get it over with. **

**After all of that, they shooed me into the closet to put on my dress while they got ready. I didn't know how they expected me to put this on myself because it was zipped up on the back and had to placed over the stupid corset. I just sat there on Rosalie's bed, wrapped in a towel, and waited for them to be finished so they could help me. It took about five minutes for the three of them to get everything done for themselves. They all had their hair pulled up high in a complicated bun and red pearl pins in it. Their dress was light so it was easy to put it on and their makeup was similiar to mine except it was much simpler. They had matching jewelry and all looked absolutely stunning. **

**"Why aren't you dressed?" Elizabeth asked when she came out. I raised an eyebrow at her.**

**"Do you really think I can get into this thing by myself?" I said gesturing to the dress. She sighed and rolled her eyes before pulling me into the closet. She slipped the dress on me and zipped it up promptly after making sure that it was on exactly right and and smoothed it. **

**When we came out, Alice and Rosalie rushed over to put on the jewelry, gloves, and shoes for me. The veil was placed on my head by Elizabeth, she was a bit fussy about its exact position on my head but eventually settled for a spot. **

**"Okay, let's go!" Alice screamed. Rosalie and Elizabeth grabbed my train and we walked carefully out of the house and climbed into the horse-drawn carriage right outside the house.**

**"Holly! Edward is going to die when he sees you!" Emmett said from the driver's spot when he saw me climb on.**

**"He's already dead Emmett. Just go so we aren't late," Rosalie stated. Emmett saluted to us, turned around, and controlled the horses forward going a trail made specifically for this carriage yesterday into the woods where I was to get married to Edward. Alice reached over and pulled the veil over my face quickly before smiling excitedly as I we came into the clearing in the middle of the woods. I took a deep breath as the carriage came to a stop at the edge of the clearing.**

**Author's Note: I didn't plan for this, but this is going to be a two-part event so hang on! Review! **


	25. I Do

**Author's Note: Here is the last installment!**

**Disclaimer: As much as I'd like to, I don't own Twilight.**

**Henry appeared after Rosalie, Alice, and Elizabeth got down from the carriage and took my hand to help me get down. Rosalie and Alice stood in front of me to make sure everything was set and Elizabeth handed me my bouquet. Red and white roses were packed together tightly and a thin see-through ribbon tied them together to form my bouquet. My bridesmaids' bouquets were made of red roses only and were tied with a white ribbon.**

"**Bella, you are drop dead gorgeous," Henry whispered as the music started. I smiled from underneath the veil and took another deep breath. **

**Elizabeth was first to walk down the long white carpet laid on the ground as the aisle. As soon as she stepped away from the shadows and into the open sun her skin ignited and glowed like an angel's. She was followed by Rosalie and Emmett. Emmett looked handsome in his black tuxedo and Rosalie was her usual beautiful self. Alice and Jasper went next. **

**Rose petals were scattered all over the aisles and at the end of the aisle were two large flower containers that held 3650 roses in between them. On either side of the aisle were seats for the few guests that attended. Henry and I invited the vampire friends that we made over the years and so did the Cullens. **

**Carlisle stood on a platform wearing a sleek black suit and a book held in his hands. It felt perfect for him to be the one to marry us. Edward stood right below Carlisle in a white tux with a red rose pinned on his right chest and smooth hair waiting for me to join him.**

"**Ready?" Henry asked offering me his hand.**

"**As ready as I'll ever be," I replied placing my hand in his. He turned and began walking me down the aisle slowly along with the music. **

**I saw Esme smile warmly from the side at the front from the corner of my eye but my eyes never left Edward. His face had shock written all over it and I felt happy that I was still able to render him speechless.**

**Henry transferred my hand from his to Edward's and bowed out to join Elizabeth. I heard Edward gulp before he turned me around to face Carlisle. Carlisle smiled and winked at me before proceeding with the ceremony.**

"**Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to join Edward Anthony Masen Cullen and Isabella Marie Swan in holy matrimony." Carlisle began and continued to explain the meaning of marriage. I listened as carefully as I could and tried to memorize it. "If there is anyone who believes these two should not be joined, speak now or forever hold your peace." There was a long silence and I noticed Edward scanned the room to make sure no one was going to stop this from happening. "Alright, Edward do you have your vows?" Edward turned and nodded but didn't take out anything from his pocket to read from.**

"**Isabella, it took 10 years for us to learn to cherish what we have even though we fell in love with each other since the beginning. I don't know of another love that went through as much as our have and doubt that I'll ever know of one. I am grateful that God sent me an angel like you to give my life meaning and I will worship you until the end of time. I wish you to be the first and last thing I see everyday for the rest of eternity. I want to be there when you cry, when you laugh, and when are doing every other heavenly thing that you do. What I feel for you cannot be written or spoken; it can simply be expressed through action. Therefore, I will dedicate my entire life to shower you with love and wipe away the tears that you cry. Bella, my angel, my life, my love, and my wife, I will love you until forever."**

**If I was human, I would've been on the floor bawling like a baby by now. All I could do was smile at him like a complete idiot and tried my best to refrain from jumping at him and smother him in kisses. **

"**Isabella, do you have your vows?" Carlisle asked snapping me out of my thoughts. I quickly nodded and calmed myself before announcing my feelings for him.**

"**Edward, for ten years we broke each other's hearts and glued it back together numerous times but never once did we question our love. I talked myself into moving on only to fall right back into your arms. We made mistake after mistake and pulled away from each other over and over again but didn't get anywhere far. You call me your angel and I call you mine. The happiest and saddest moments of my life were spent with you and no one else compared. I would trade 20 years of life to spend a single minute with you. I wish to spend forever in your arms and looking in your eyes. You have kept my heart prisoner since the day we met and I have never gotten back or ever want it back. Edward, I love you more than life itself."**

**Edward stared at me wide-eyed. I wasn't sure if what I said made any sense at all, because to me, it sounded out of order and all over the place. Then, his eyes went back to normal and he smiled his crooked smile making my legs feel like jelly.**

"**Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, do you take Isabella Marie Swan as your wife to have and to hold? For better or for worse? And till death do you part?" Said Carlisle guessing he needed to rush things due to the look on Edward's face. Edward glanced at me before looking Carlisle in the eyes again.**

"**I do," he announced. **

"**Isabella Marie Swan, do you take Edward Anthony Masen Cullen as you husband to have and to hold? For better or for worse? And till death do you part?" Carlisle asked turning to me. I waited a brief second to make sure I wouldn't lose my voice and I felt Edward tensed as he glanced at me. I smiled reassuringly and focused on Carlisle.**

"**I definitely do," I answered. Edward grinned and turned his whole body towards me just waiting for permission from Carlisle.**

"**You may kiss the bride," granted Carlisle. **

**Edward lifted my veil slowly as if he was unwrapping a Christmas present and looked me in the eye for a brief moment before leaning in and pecked me on the lips. After ten seconds, he still wouldn't pull away and the cheers were getting a bit awkward so I pulled away myself. He seemed surprised and his ego was a bit hurt but nothing permanent. I straightened and turned to the crowd. **

"**It's time for the bouquet toss ladies!" I shouted. The girls gathered around in front of me and giggled. Elizabeth seemed a bit loss as Alice dragged her to the front but played along nonetheless. **

**I turned around swiftly, closed my eyes, and threw the bouquet over my head and into the crowd. I heard brief screaming and then silence. When I turned around, I laughed at the sight of Elizabeth staring at it in her hands blankly. I scanned the room for Henry and when I met his eyes he winked at me. I smiled understanding what he was telling me. I was suddenly swept off my feet and carried swiftly back up the aisle and tossed into the carriage.**

"**Edward, where are we going?" I asked as he began to pull the ropes and the horses took off.**

"**Wedding night," he answered pushing the horses to their limits. "God, these things are slow!" I laughed lightly and held on to the seat to keep from bouncing all over the place.**

"**It's not a shiny Volvo, Edward. And it's not even dark yet." He ignored me as we came in sight of the house and hopped down. I only got my right foot on the ground before he proceeded to carrying me into the house and up the stairs. **

**He pushed the bedroom door closed with his foot and dropped me onto the bed. It took him a few moments to figure out where to go to unzip the dress. When he saw what I was wearing underneath, he stared at me blankly.**

"**Don't even say anything. I wouldn't be in this stupid thing if it weren't for you and hurry up, I can barely breathe in this thing." He smirked and leaned down.**

"**Your wish is my command," he whispered. I giggled and turned the lights off with my mind.**

**Author's Note: There's your ending! See you soon! Review!**


	26. Years

**Author's Note: Thank you for all the support. I have added a new addition to my collection of stories. I have decided to write a companion to DECADE. The story is in Edward's POV and it will explain some of the confusion not to mention give the story much more detail. The story is named YEARS. Maybe I will write a compainion to LOVING DOUBTS too. Go read and review please!**


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